Hey there! Yes, it has been 2 full weeks since I last posted anything. Yes, I do realize I am in the Worst Blogger Ever category. But, I have been really busy. For reals.
My sweet little Rachel Pie is home and we have been busy staying up damn near all night long playing cards, drinking tea, drinking eggnog, crocheting, watching Christmas movies, you know, the usual.
Plus there have been many days of trudging through the grocery store to get everything we need to make:
A. Chex Party Mix. It is not the holidays around here without tons and tons of Chex Party Mix. My s-i-l and I both make it and we go through that stuff like there's no tomorrow.
B. Tamales. Tamales are a traditional thing to make for Christmas eve and we really try to make good ones and have enough to get through New Year's.
C. Christmas candy and treats to pass out to the neighbors.
D. Regular meals during all of this holiday shenanigans.
Now about the candy, let me tell you this, I got the recipe from the blog of someone else, and since I haven't asked her permission to send you over there, I won't do that just yet. But if she tells me "yes, please send your 5 readers over here" I will do just that. I got the recipe she calls Crock Pot Candy and thought it seemed like a really fun idea. So I bought all the ingredients and did as it told me to layer them up in the crock pot and leave them for 3 hours. DO NOT TOUCH OR STIR FOR THREE HOURS! And then you stir it all up and drop by spoonfulls into little miniature cupcake papers to set up.
I left it the requisite 3 hours and went in to find a 2 inch thick wall all the way around the inside of the crock pot of burnt all the way to charcoal mess. It was horrendous. You have never smelled anything so gross. Not to mention it took days to soak, scrub and chisel that crap out of the crock pot and try to get rid of the burnt smell.
I got a few more ingredients and tried again. I'm so brave, right?
This time I checked it after 1 hour and it was almost ready. After 1 1/2 hours it was perfect. My crock pot must run really hot in the low heat button. I don't know what's up with it. But half the time was just right for my crock pot. I guess crock pots are like microwaves in that they are each a bit different and quirky.
So Rachel Pie and I got all the little shiny gold and silver papers ready and dropped all the ooey gooey goodness in to them and I added some crushed peppermint on top for festiveness. We packaged these in little tins with gold tissue paper and passed them out to the neighbors. And within an hour of returning home several of them had called to say how much they loved the candy. Now I don't know about you, but when people come calling with treats I tend to put them on the holiday table to serve along with all my other goodies. I don't generally open the package and scarf them down right there at the door. But that is what they seemed to do, and they all loved them. New recipe to add to the holiday repetoire.
Today is our 30th wedding anniversary. Can you believe that? Mr. Big Ed and I are officially old farts if we are that damn old.
Here's something else you aren't going to believe! (Lisa Pie's blog, where you come to find the unbelieveable and be astounded) Mr. Big Ed is known far and wide by his lack of the shopping and gifting gene. The man just doesn't like to shop and is oblivious to gifts, getting or receiving. It has taken a lot of years for him to get to the point where he is today.
In fairness, it has taken me a lot of years to learn to tone it down when gifting to him, because his not wanting a lot of stuff and a lot of fuss made over him is not a character flaw.
So when we exchanged our anniversary gifts, I almost fell out of my chair when I opened the box to find a 36 inch strand of Tahitian black pearls.
I'll just let that sentence stand alone and let that thought soak in. Pearl is the traditional gift for 30 year anniversary. Black pearls are one of the things that would be on my bucket list of things to acquire.
I may have toned down my gift giving just a tad too much, since all I got him was a cute little thing to heat up his towels for after the shower. I am not saying it's a crap gift, but next to black pearls? It didn't look all that awesome. I hope he enjoys it as much as I will enjoy those pearls!
Monday, December 26, 2011
Friday, December 16, 2011
Mr. Big Ed knocks one out of the park!!
Okay, you know how husbands are NEVER as funny as they think they are? Mr. Big Ed is exceptional in this regard. I never think his jokes are funny. He is an unfunny man, is what he is.
We were out driving the other day and it was cold and rainy and pissy and just generally gross. And on top of that is was dusk-ish so there was very little visibility. I pulled up to a stop sign at a T intersection and there in the T in front of us was a huge lot very overgrown and lots of trees and such and in there was a deer. This is not an unusual phenomenon, we have all sorts of great wildlife in our neighborhood. We were talking about how it must be hard on them in this weather never having a good place to stay warm and dry. That constant dampness must be a hardship on them.
So I said something like "does he look unhappy?" and Mr. Big Ed says . . . . .
"He just has that deer in the headlights look".
Ba da pa, buuuum. (rim shot)
We were out driving the other day and it was cold and rainy and pissy and just generally gross. And on top of that is was dusk-ish so there was very little visibility. I pulled up to a stop sign at a T intersection and there in the T in front of us was a huge lot very overgrown and lots of trees and such and in there was a deer. This is not an unusual phenomenon, we have all sorts of great wildlife in our neighborhood. We were talking about how it must be hard on them in this weather never having a good place to stay warm and dry. That constant dampness must be a hardship on them.
So I said something like "does he look unhappy?" and Mr. Big Ed says . . . . .
"He just has that deer in the headlights look".
Ba da pa, buuuum. (rim shot)
Monday, December 12, 2011
What's going on over here
I thought I would take a minute to let you know what has been going on with me. I have been so irritated with the Christmas lights situation that it was completely ruining my holiday spirit. I have a couple strings of the really old lights that use the big bulbs, you know the ones I mean. But this house is so darn big out front that these strings would not really cover very much, so I have not been using them. Anyhoo, all this is to say that there was a time when Christmas lights were made well. Made to last, in fact. Everyone knew the bulbs would burn out and that's why you bought spare bulbs.
But over the last 5 years or so, maybe even 10 years, the lights (and I am speaking here mostly of the interior ones for going on the tree and such) are of lesser and lesser quality and don't seem to make it through more than one or two seasons. Why is that? Did people forget how to do it right? Or is it more likely that there is some "cutting of corners" going on in the factories? I am sure someone came up with the bright idea that they could make more money selling replacement strings of lights rather than a few bulbs.
But what happens to all these dead strings of lights? Did no one ever consider where they go? Or how will they break down?
On top of all THAT! a couple years ago I was testing and unwinding lights to put on the tree and happened to look down at the plastic tags attached near the plug end of the strand and it said something along the lines of "Warning! light strings are coated in lead. Be sure to not put your hands in your mouth and wash hands thoroughly after handling! MADE IN CHINA"
Huh?
Wtf?
Lead? Really?
So I started researching and found that the ones that say LED on the box are supposed to be a much better, and safer product. Not only that they claim that they never burn out. Now, that's a claim I can get behind! And of course I expected to pay a lot more for this product. Gradually, as my strings of lights kept burning out and I would very guiltily throw them in the trash, I was replacing them with the more expensive counterparts of LED lights.
And you know how they said "never burn out"?? That's a big, fat ass lie. Not only do they go out, but there is no possible way to just replace that bulb and move on. The whole damn expensive strand of lights is now expensive landfill that will probably leach toxic shit into the water.
I am just disgusted and irritated and totally out of the holiday spirit by now. And I did what I always do when faced with this kind of situation.
I asked myself, "Self, what did people do BEFORE the strands of lights?"
I know, you are going to say candles, and that they are not safe.
But surely there was something in between the days of candles and burning down the house and today's life-threatening lead-coated pieces of crap???
And I remembered seeing something from the old days that I thought would fit my needs perfectly.
Yep, I have gone old school.
We here at Chez Lisa Pie will be rocking the aluminum tree with the color wheel!
The color wheel is an all metal item that is from the 1960s and is still working. One thing to plug in rather than 6 inferior pieces of crap that will decide to quit working.
I am soooo excited to get this thing here!!
I will keep the crappy lights that I have now and do my best to keep them working until the day I have to send them to the landfill, but I have my way out of that consumer loop now.
I did try to post the pictures of my exact tree but couldn't. So when it arrives I will photograph the whole process of opening the box and each of the 151 branches that go on it. Woot!!!
In other news, it was my birthday last week. We went out last night to celebrate by eating at our favorite restaurant, Lüke and then going to The Majestic Theater to see Fiddler on the Roof. Everything was first rate. The food, the company, the wine, the weather, the show. The evening could only have been made better by the participation of the precious Rachel Pie, who sadly will not be here with us until this coming Saturday. Yay for Saturday!! Yay for Rachel Pie coming home!!
Rachel Pie's lovely partner who has not given me permission to use her name so I will call her Partner of Pie will be going to spend Christmas with her family. One of these days we will have to get all of Partner's family here with all of our family so no one has to pick and choose who to be with and who to leave. Anyhoo, what that means is that I get Rachel Pie all to myself for a few days. Oh, the slumber partying we will do! All the snuggling! The staying up really late playing cards! All the tamale-making! It's gonna be a fun time here at the house! Yes, indeedy. Maybe Rachel Pie and I will get really cute matching Mother-Daughter Christmas sweaters or something?
Yeah, like that would ever happen. Hee!!!
But over the last 5 years or so, maybe even 10 years, the lights (and I am speaking here mostly of the interior ones for going on the tree and such) are of lesser and lesser quality and don't seem to make it through more than one or two seasons. Why is that? Did people forget how to do it right? Or is it more likely that there is some "cutting of corners" going on in the factories? I am sure someone came up with the bright idea that they could make more money selling replacement strings of lights rather than a few bulbs.
But what happens to all these dead strings of lights? Did no one ever consider where they go? Or how will they break down?
On top of all THAT! a couple years ago I was testing and unwinding lights to put on the tree and happened to look down at the plastic tags attached near the plug end of the strand and it said something along the lines of "Warning! light strings are coated in lead. Be sure to not put your hands in your mouth and wash hands thoroughly after handling! MADE IN CHINA"
Huh?
Wtf?
Lead? Really?
So I started researching and found that the ones that say LED on the box are supposed to be a much better, and safer product. Not only that they claim that they never burn out. Now, that's a claim I can get behind! And of course I expected to pay a lot more for this product. Gradually, as my strings of lights kept burning out and I would very guiltily throw them in the trash, I was replacing them with the more expensive counterparts of LED lights.
And you know how they said "never burn out"?? That's a big, fat ass lie. Not only do they go out, but there is no possible way to just replace that bulb and move on. The whole damn expensive strand of lights is now expensive landfill that will probably leach toxic shit into the water.
I am just disgusted and irritated and totally out of the holiday spirit by now. And I did what I always do when faced with this kind of situation.
I asked myself, "Self, what did people do BEFORE the strands of lights?"
I know, you are going to say candles, and that they are not safe.
But surely there was something in between the days of candles and burning down the house and today's life-threatening lead-coated pieces of crap???
And I remembered seeing something from the old days that I thought would fit my needs perfectly.
Yep, I have gone old school.
We here at Chez Lisa Pie will be rocking the aluminum tree with the color wheel!
The color wheel is an all metal item that is from the 1960s and is still working. One thing to plug in rather than 6 inferior pieces of crap that will decide to quit working.
I am soooo excited to get this thing here!!
I will keep the crappy lights that I have now and do my best to keep them working until the day I have to send them to the landfill, but I have my way out of that consumer loop now.
I did try to post the pictures of my exact tree but couldn't. So when it arrives I will photograph the whole process of opening the box and each of the 151 branches that go on it. Woot!!!
In other news, it was my birthday last week. We went out last night to celebrate by eating at our favorite restaurant, Lüke and then going to The Majestic Theater to see Fiddler on the Roof. Everything was first rate. The food, the company, the wine, the weather, the show. The evening could only have been made better by the participation of the precious Rachel Pie, who sadly will not be here with us until this coming Saturday. Yay for Saturday!! Yay for Rachel Pie coming home!!
Rachel Pie's lovely partner who has not given me permission to use her name so I will call her Partner of Pie will be going to spend Christmas with her family. One of these days we will have to get all of Partner's family here with all of our family so no one has to pick and choose who to be with and who to leave. Anyhoo, what that means is that I get Rachel Pie all to myself for a few days. Oh, the slumber partying we will do! All the snuggling! The staying up really late playing cards! All the tamale-making! It's gonna be a fun time here at the house! Yes, indeedy. Maybe Rachel Pie and I will get really cute matching Mother-Daughter Christmas sweaters or something?
Yeah, like that would ever happen. Hee!!!
Saturday, December 10, 2011
I want to do this
You may or may not know of my love of AC/DC.
Here is the list of the Top AC/DC inspired Christmas light extravaganzas.
Enjoy!!
This one is my favorite, not just because it's my favorite AC/DC song, but because it's THREE HOUSES all synched together to the music. How awesome is that??
Any one think The Colonel and Miss Betty want to team up with us for an AC/DC themed Christmas?
Merry Christmas!
Here is the list of the Top AC/DC inspired Christmas light extravaganzas.
Enjoy!!
This one is my favorite, not just because it's my favorite AC/DC song, but because it's THREE HOUSES all synched together to the music. How awesome is that??
Any one think The Colonel and Miss Betty want to team up with us for an AC/DC themed Christmas?
Merry Christmas!
Friday, December 9, 2011
I'm Lisa Pie and I don't approve of all of these messages
You know that I live in the great state of Texas, right? And you must know that our state foisted that sorry ass Shrub on you as president, and for that I am very sorry. I didn't live here at the time, and never once did I vote for him.
And now? Holy shitballs! This maroon of a governor we have is running around making the Shrub look like the smart one. Is there no one around him who can keep him at home with his mouth shut?
Look at his latest bullshit move:
Now watch some anti-Perry, anti-Christian rebuttal to this:
And last, but certainly not least, here is a message to Rick "the hair-do" Perry from Jesus:
Rick Perry is a wiener. He has a terrible record on women's and children's issues. If you want an in-depth look at what he has done in his political career here in Texas, go to Amazon and buy "Adios MoFo".
I heard the NPR interview with one of the authors and it seems that the publisher threw lots of money their way to write this book when Perry started showing interest in running. Then when he started slipping in the polls, they backed off, so it is only available as an e-book.
A year or so ago at a press conference, a particular reporter just kept pushing at Perry to answer some questions about what he has done to the schools and teachers in our fine state and he kept trying to duck them and not give a straight forward answer. At the end of it, when he thought his mic was off, he looked right at the reporter and said "Adios MoFo".
Nice, right?
So, that's where the book title came from. Give it a read and encourage anyone you know who might actually vote for this twit in a hair-do to also read it.
And now? Holy shitballs! This maroon of a governor we have is running around making the Shrub look like the smart one. Is there no one around him who can keep him at home with his mouth shut?
Look at his latest bullshit move:
Now watch some anti-Perry, anti-Christian rebuttal to this:
And last, but certainly not least, here is a message to Rick "the hair-do" Perry from Jesus:
Rick Perry is a wiener. He has a terrible record on women's and children's issues. If you want an in-depth look at what he has done in his political career here in Texas, go to Amazon and buy "Adios MoFo".
I heard the NPR interview with one of the authors and it seems that the publisher threw lots of money their way to write this book when Perry started showing interest in running. Then when he started slipping in the polls, they backed off, so it is only available as an e-book.
A year or so ago at a press conference, a particular reporter just kept pushing at Perry to answer some questions about what he has done to the schools and teachers in our fine state and he kept trying to duck them and not give a straight forward answer. At the end of it, when he thought his mic was off, he looked right at the reporter and said "Adios MoFo".
Nice, right?
So, that's where the book title came from. Give it a read and encourage anyone you know who might actually vote for this twit in a hair-do to also read it.
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
Look what I got
Look what I got sent to me!
My daughter, the fabulous Rachel Pie's partner sent me this picture. And you know how a picture is worth a thousand words?
Well, check this out:
Bahahahahahahaha!!!!!
Just look at Kim up there with her 1980's phone!
Is that the most hilarious thing you have ever seen?
The next time I go back to where my aunt lives, I am going to the cemetary to take a picture of this headstone that reads "I told you I was sick".
Heeee! I bet her family all feel like morons having to go see that little message everytime they go pay their respects to grandma.
p.s. It's my birthday and I am off to finish putting up Christmas decorations and set up for a lunch time party I am hosting on Friday.
Thanks for stopping by!
My daughter, the fabulous Rachel Pie's partner sent me this picture. And you know how a picture is worth a thousand words?
Well, check this out:
Bahahahahahahaha!!!!!
Just look at Kim up there with her 1980's phone!
Is that the most hilarious thing you have ever seen?
The next time I go back to where my aunt lives, I am going to the cemetary to take a picture of this headstone that reads "I told you I was sick".
Heeee! I bet her family all feel like morons having to go see that little message everytime they go pay their respects to grandma.
p.s. It's my birthday and I am off to finish putting up Christmas decorations and set up for a lunch time party I am hosting on Friday.
Thanks for stopping by!
Tuesday, December 6, 2011
World's Worst Blogger
That's me, the World's Worst Blogger. I have been gone lo these many weeks. I think it has been 3 full weeks since I have posted anything. Just did not feel the spirit move in me. Nothing felt worthwhile of sharing.
And now, look at what has happened!
Awww! I can just hear y'all now, everyone saying Awww together. Is that the cutest little guy EVER?
Well guess what?
He's dead now.
So sad. His name is Pusuke and he lived in Japan. He was in the Guinness Book of World Records.
For being the OLDEST LIVING DOG IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD.
And now he has up and died at the ripe old age of . . . .
wait for it . . . . .
Twenty six years and nine months.
That my friends, is a LONG life for a doggie.
And just for the hell of it, here are some new and random photos from my life.
This first photo is of my son Sparky's newest tattoo. A famous portrait tattoo artist was here and so Sparky took a photo of his grandmother (Mr. Big Ed's late Mama) from back when she was in high school and had this tattoo done. It is very well done and looks great.
It's on his leg, by the by.
Next up we have me and Mr. Big Ed playing with the photo booth thing on my computer. Look at us! We are on a roller coaster!!
Oh look! It's my Halloween pedicure! Jack-o-lantern toesies! They were cute.
Now if you are from Texas or anywhere that has a huge Mexican population you have seen barbacoa places. If you are not, then what you should know is that barbacoa is awesome and delicious. And some of the worst artery-clogging stuff you can put in your body. It is the whole head of the cow slow roasted in coals forever and it is the most tender delicous stuff. But really, it is not good for you at all.
And what better place to put a Curves gym than right next to the place that makes you fat enough to need the Curves gym! It's like a before and after. Go straight from the barbacoa place over to Curves and sign up, fatties!
Makes me wonder which was there first!
There's a corner gas station near here where a guy sets up his little stand selling bonsai trees. And this is the signage he put out. Check this out.
Were Take Credit Debit????? Really??
Next time I will show you my November and now my December toes. Oh, the December color is fabulous. It's the OPI Ruby Pumps in case you want to run right out and get your toeses all holidayed-up and ready to party.
Thanks for coming back by and I will do better about getting back here more frequently. I guess I just needed a little break.
Back to the decorating, and gift wrapping, and starting the baking!
And now, look at what has happened!
Awww! I can just hear y'all now, everyone saying Awww together. Is that the cutest little guy EVER?
Well guess what?
He's dead now.
So sad. His name is Pusuke and he lived in Japan. He was in the Guinness Book of World Records.
For being the OLDEST LIVING DOG IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD.
And now he has up and died at the ripe old age of . . . .
wait for it . . . . .
Twenty six years and nine months.
That my friends, is a LONG life for a doggie.
And just for the hell of it, here are some new and random photos from my life.
This first photo is of my son Sparky's newest tattoo. A famous portrait tattoo artist was here and so Sparky took a photo of his grandmother (Mr. Big Ed's late Mama) from back when she was in high school and had this tattoo done. It is very well done and looks great.
It's on his leg, by the by.
Next up we have me and Mr. Big Ed playing with the photo booth thing on my computer. Look at us! We are on a roller coaster!!
Oh look! It's my Halloween pedicure! Jack-o-lantern toesies! They were cute.
Now if you are from Texas or anywhere that has a huge Mexican population you have seen barbacoa places. If you are not, then what you should know is that barbacoa is awesome and delicious. And some of the worst artery-clogging stuff you can put in your body. It is the whole head of the cow slow roasted in coals forever and it is the most tender delicous stuff. But really, it is not good for you at all.
And what better place to put a Curves gym than right next to the place that makes you fat enough to need the Curves gym! It's like a before and after. Go straight from the barbacoa place over to Curves and sign up, fatties!
Makes me wonder which was there first!
There's a corner gas station near here where a guy sets up his little stand selling bonsai trees. And this is the signage he put out. Check this out.
Were Take Credit Debit????? Really??
Next time I will show you my November and now my December toes. Oh, the December color is fabulous. It's the OPI Ruby Pumps in case you want to run right out and get your toeses all holidayed-up and ready to party.
Thanks for coming back by and I will do better about getting back here more frequently. I guess I just needed a little break.
Back to the decorating, and gift wrapping, and starting the baking!
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
New Product!!
Girls, you are going to be so excited (and Up-cited too!) when you hear what I have to tell you.
You know how we all love Girl Scout cookies? We all have our favorites. And you can only get them once a year. And then those darn cookies are glued to your ass for the next 12 months? You know what I am talking about.
Look at this!!
Those are Girl Scout Cookie Lip Smackers! Mmmmmm.
All the goodness of the cookies, none of the calories.
Stocking Stuffers!
Available at Claire's and at the Evil Empire Sprawl-Mart. But please, go buy yours at Claire's.
I will be heading out there today.
Oh, and before I do head out I had something to tell you. I bought the Market Pantry (Target brand) of Ro-Tel to put in a dish since I don't buy Ro-Tel any longer and guess what?
NO WHITE BPA CARCINOGENS!!!
Hooray for Target!
Guess who will be getting a glowing atta-boy from me today?
Also, I have had such wonderful experiences lately shopping in Lowe's doing all these home projects that I went to their website to see if I could let them know. And right there under customer service is a little link to click on for "Employee Compliments". They made the shopping experience pleasant and then they made it really easy to let them know. Win, Win on that one.
And this is why I heart the Lowe's.
You know how we all love Girl Scout cookies? We all have our favorites. And you can only get them once a year. And then those darn cookies are glued to your ass for the next 12 months? You know what I am talking about.
Look at this!!
Those are Girl Scout Cookie Lip Smackers! Mmmmmm.
All the goodness of the cookies, none of the calories.
Stocking Stuffers!
Available at Claire's and at the Evil Empire Sprawl-Mart. But please, go buy yours at Claire's.
I will be heading out there today.
Oh, and before I do head out I had something to tell you. I bought the Market Pantry (Target brand) of Ro-Tel to put in a dish since I don't buy Ro-Tel any longer and guess what?
NO WHITE BPA CARCINOGENS!!!
Hooray for Target!
Guess who will be getting a glowing atta-boy from me today?
Also, I have had such wonderful experiences lately shopping in Lowe's doing all these home projects that I went to their website to see if I could let them know. And right there under customer service is a little link to click on for "Employee Compliments". They made the shopping experience pleasant and then they made it really easy to let them know. Win, Win on that one.
And this is why I heart the Lowe's.
Monday, November 7, 2011
The Reading of O'bits
Obituary reading! Gasp! It has been f o r e v e r, hasn't it?
Under the Interesting Way to Say Died column we have:
"was granted her angel wings on Nov. 3, 2011"
"went unto our Lord"
Then we have 2 fabulous and very interesting obits to look at.
The first one is for a lovely lady named Mary Jo, she had a "before and after" picture thing in hers. You know, one when she was really young and had the awesome 1940's Joan Crawford looking hair style and the other as an elderly lady. She is really pretty with dark lipstick and a twinkle in her eye and that Mona Lisa kind of smile in the young/before picture. But the after photo? Awesome, is what it is!
She is sporting a hat with flowers on it and a big, wide, happy infectious smile. That's a person I wish I had known.
Here is a few snippets of what the family had to say about her:
"She was born Jan. 14, 1924 in the Family Quarters of the Georgetown Jailhouse. Her father was the Marshall and Jailer."
**See, right there sounds like there were some great stories in this family.
"She so loved and protected each and every member of her family. She endured much sadness as her father was killed in the line of duty, her husband was a prisoner of war, the loss of a daughter, a son and a grand daughter. She handled this with grace and a great deal of faith."
This brings me to the other one that was really endearing.
"Elsie Beulah was a generous person with a heart as big as Texas and a carefully cloaked but acute and penetrating sense of humor. She loved live theatre, dance, music, art, black and white clothes, reading, playing cards, tooling around in her classic 1978 Honda Civic, recycling, cheering the St. Louis Cardinals, collecting stuffed mooses, drinking margaritas and champagne, and throwing parties."
***Now if that weren't enough fun facts, get a load of THIS:
"She was a fantastic cook of all sorts of dishes including lasagna, pot roast, grits, stroganoff, baked spaghetti, prison jack, bean loaf, hide the pickle, gourmet toast, pies, cakes, puddings, top-shelf turkey gravy and on and on."
***Prison Jack? Bean Loaf? Hide the Pickle???
"She vanquished crossword puzzles with abandon almost to the end. She knew more words than God."
***Heeee! Really?
"In lieu of flowers, please give someone a warm hug and a kiss today or send a donation to . . . . "
**Awww, isn't that wonderful?
Elsie Beulah sounds like my kind of woman.
One last tribute here, this one is a bit odd to me. I had a hard time understanding it. Which means it was kind of family-inside-knowledge information or something. But also, that future generations may have a hard time understanding it as well. Check this out:
"Col. Joseph "Lew" Walter Lewandoski, aged 94, went to his creator, master and God on Nov. 1."
Then it goes on to say "Joseph is preceded in death by his parents, his daughter, Carol Munn, and his brother Steve and his wife, Doris. He leaves behind his "Night & Day" love, Helen."
***Now, does this mean Joseph's wife Doris is dead and he has a Night & Day love named Helen? Or does it mean that his brother Steve had a wife named Doris and the Night & Day love named Helen is Joseph's wife? It kind of threw me off reading it and I had to go over it about 20 times.
Last, there was one nice looking gentleman who died on his own birthday. I wonder how many times that happens?
Enjoy your day!
Under the Interesting Way to Say Died column we have:
"was granted her angel wings on Nov. 3, 2011"
"went unto our Lord"
Then we have 2 fabulous and very interesting obits to look at.
The first one is for a lovely lady named Mary Jo, she had a "before and after" picture thing in hers. You know, one when she was really young and had the awesome 1940's Joan Crawford looking hair style and the other as an elderly lady. She is really pretty with dark lipstick and a twinkle in her eye and that Mona Lisa kind of smile in the young/before picture. But the after photo? Awesome, is what it is!
She is sporting a hat with flowers on it and a big, wide, happy infectious smile. That's a person I wish I had known.
Here is a few snippets of what the family had to say about her:
"She was born Jan. 14, 1924 in the Family Quarters of the Georgetown Jailhouse. Her father was the Marshall and Jailer."
**See, right there sounds like there were some great stories in this family.
"She so loved and protected each and every member of her family. She endured much sadness as her father was killed in the line of duty, her husband was a prisoner of war, the loss of a daughter, a son and a grand daughter. She handled this with grace and a great deal of faith."
This brings me to the other one that was really endearing.
"Elsie Beulah was a generous person with a heart as big as Texas and a carefully cloaked but acute and penetrating sense of humor. She loved live theatre, dance, music, art, black and white clothes, reading, playing cards, tooling around in her classic 1978 Honda Civic, recycling, cheering the St. Louis Cardinals, collecting stuffed mooses, drinking margaritas and champagne, and throwing parties."
***Now if that weren't enough fun facts, get a load of THIS:
"She was a fantastic cook of all sorts of dishes including lasagna, pot roast, grits, stroganoff, baked spaghetti, prison jack, bean loaf, hide the pickle, gourmet toast, pies, cakes, puddings, top-shelf turkey gravy and on and on."
***Prison Jack? Bean Loaf? Hide the Pickle???
"She vanquished crossword puzzles with abandon almost to the end. She knew more words than God."
***Heeee! Really?
"In lieu of flowers, please give someone a warm hug and a kiss today or send a donation to . . . . "
**Awww, isn't that wonderful?
Elsie Beulah sounds like my kind of woman.
One last tribute here, this one is a bit odd to me. I had a hard time understanding it. Which means it was kind of family-inside-knowledge information or something. But also, that future generations may have a hard time understanding it as well. Check this out:
"Col. Joseph "Lew" Walter Lewandoski, aged 94, went to his creator, master and God on Nov. 1."
Then it goes on to say "Joseph is preceded in death by his parents, his daughter, Carol Munn, and his brother Steve and his wife, Doris. He leaves behind his "Night & Day" love, Helen."
***Now, does this mean Joseph's wife Doris is dead and he has a Night & Day love named Helen? Or does it mean that his brother Steve had a wife named Doris and the Night & Day love named Helen is Joseph's wife? It kind of threw me off reading it and I had to go over it about 20 times.
Last, there was one nice looking gentleman who died on his own birthday. I wonder how many times that happens?
Enjoy your day!
Sunday, November 6, 2011
Thanksgiving Plans and Menu
I realize I like to plan things maybe a little too much. I realize that others are not as planning-oriented as myself. I know that I should be tolerant of others and their desire to wander through life willy-nilly with not a thought to a major holiday meal coming around the pike in less than 3 weeks.
But I am running out of patience for those slacker types of people. If I go to the effort to call you and email you and invite you to my table and to stay in my home, would it KILL you to respond? Would the earth stop spinning on its axis if you, oh say maybe, you know, PLANNED more than 24 hours in advance?
It doesn't make any sense to me. Because the people who do this are the very. same. people. who always claim to be so fucking busy that they have to plan their lives a whole year in advance to get a day off of work or whatever. If you need to plan a year in advance to take a day off, I think you already know if you are going to be free for Thanksgiving or not. If you just don't want to tell me "No thanks, we are waiting for a better offer and just don't want tell you this" I can see how this strategy might be the one you would use. But come on, a little consideration. I asked you here because we love you and want to spend one day being thankful that you are in our lives and for you to be so rude as to not even reply kind of makes me feel my gratitude for your presence might be uncalled for?
Boy, I hate feeling this way. Especially since I am participating in the "Let's be thankful for one thing each day" facebook status thing for the 3rd year running. And this year I have chosen to only list people, not things. I am having a really hard time being thankful for twits with no manners.
I guess it really only matters for me to know how many to set the table for and whether or not I need to buy a gigantic turkey and double the side dishes or not. But it still irks me. I told Mr. Big Ed last night I really felt like calling them all back and rescinding the invites. He is much nicer and more diplomatic than I am and thinks we should just send a blanket email to all the slackers and say something along the lines of "hey, we haven't heard from you and realize you are probably busy with other plans and just haven't called. We will miss you around the table this year. Maybe next holiday?" I don't know whether that is really nicer or just kind of passive-aggressive.
Regardless, I still have to make the same plans, the same lists, menus, etc. whether I do it for 6 or 26. And I have been working on the menu and lists. Last year's menu was such a hit that I am planning to do almost the exact same one this year. I will leave out a few things that were only so-so, and bring in a few winners from the previous years.
Here's what I have so far:
Roast Turkey with Maple Herb Butter and Gravy. This is from the Bon Apetit 1994 Thanksgiving issue. Here is a link to last year where I posted the recipe.
New England Sausage, Apple and Cranberry Dressing (from the same issue of Bon Apetit)
Buttermilk Mashed Potatoes with Bacon
Mashed Yams in Orange Cups (this is also from Bon Apetit, different year)
Cranberry Relish with Grapefruit and Mint (Here is the link to where I posted that recipe last year)
Shaved Brussels Sprouts with Ham and Pecans
Edamame Succotash (pretty much edamame, corn, parsley and a bit of bacon)
Rolls
Desserts (haven't picked them out yet)
How are the plans going for your Thanksgiving dinner? Do you plan? Are you a planner? Do planners like me drive you as crazy as the slackers drive me? Any ideas on how I can avoid these issues for the next round of invites to the tamalada and Christmas?
But I am running out of patience for those slacker types of people. If I go to the effort to call you and email you and invite you to my table and to stay in my home, would it KILL you to respond? Would the earth stop spinning on its axis if you, oh say maybe, you know, PLANNED more than 24 hours in advance?
It doesn't make any sense to me. Because the people who do this are the very. same. people. who always claim to be so fucking busy that they have to plan their lives a whole year in advance to get a day off of work or whatever. If you need to plan a year in advance to take a day off, I think you already know if you are going to be free for Thanksgiving or not. If you just don't want to tell me "No thanks, we are waiting for a better offer and just don't want tell you this" I can see how this strategy might be the one you would use. But come on, a little consideration. I asked you here because we love you and want to spend one day being thankful that you are in our lives and for you to be so rude as to not even reply kind of makes me feel my gratitude for your presence might be uncalled for?
Boy, I hate feeling this way. Especially since I am participating in the "Let's be thankful for one thing each day" facebook status thing for the 3rd year running. And this year I have chosen to only list people, not things. I am having a really hard time being thankful for twits with no manners.
I guess it really only matters for me to know how many to set the table for and whether or not I need to buy a gigantic turkey and double the side dishes or not. But it still irks me. I told Mr. Big Ed last night I really felt like calling them all back and rescinding the invites. He is much nicer and more diplomatic than I am and thinks we should just send a blanket email to all the slackers and say something along the lines of "hey, we haven't heard from you and realize you are probably busy with other plans and just haven't called. We will miss you around the table this year. Maybe next holiday?" I don't know whether that is really nicer or just kind of passive-aggressive.
Regardless, I still have to make the same plans, the same lists, menus, etc. whether I do it for 6 or 26. And I have been working on the menu and lists. Last year's menu was such a hit that I am planning to do almost the exact same one this year. I will leave out a few things that were only so-so, and bring in a few winners from the previous years.
Here's what I have so far:
Roast Turkey with Maple Herb Butter and Gravy. This is from the Bon Apetit 1994 Thanksgiving issue. Here is a link to last year where I posted the recipe.
New England Sausage, Apple and Cranberry Dressing (from the same issue of Bon Apetit)
Buttermilk Mashed Potatoes with Bacon
Mashed Yams in Orange Cups (this is also from Bon Apetit, different year)
Cranberry Relish with Grapefruit and Mint (Here is the link to where I posted that recipe last year)
Shaved Brussels Sprouts with Ham and Pecans
Edamame Succotash (pretty much edamame, corn, parsley and a bit of bacon)
Rolls
Desserts (haven't picked them out yet)
How are the plans going for your Thanksgiving dinner? Do you plan? Are you a planner? Do planners like me drive you as crazy as the slackers drive me? Any ideas on how I can avoid these issues for the next round of invites to the tamalada and Christmas?
Friday, November 4, 2011
You put what? where? Reeeeally?
Here is the story David Sedaris told us the other night. Now, you and I both know that it was WAAAAYY funnier when he told it, but I will do my best.
It seems 30 years ago a friend of DS told him this story. The friend was dying to go to the bathroom and his father called. So he answered and was talking to his dad.
But he really had to go.
So David Sedaris said to his friend, "so what did you do?"
To which the friend replied, "I shit in my hand." Like it was the most normal thing in the world.
David was shocked and taken aback. But the friend was adament that this was not such a big deal. It was 30 years ago. And we were all tethered to the wall with our phone cords and such.
So years later he is telling this story to a woman friend. And instead of being shocked and taken aback, she says . . . .
"Well, OF COURSE he did! I always shit in my hand. Well, not always, but you know, when I am in a public restroom".
Huh???
"Yes," she went on, "when you are in public you don't want that loud splashy noise going on, so you shit in your hand and then gently drop it in with NO loud splash. Why? Don't you do that?"
*We were all about to fall out of our seats laughing at this story.
Then he goes on to say that he could not believe that everyone shits in their hands and he was the last one to know about this. So when he is on book tours and such and around a lot of people to ask, he now asks people if they shit in their hands. And a couple of days ago he was telling this story and asking someone about their experience with shitting in their hand and the lady behind that person pipes up with this contribution, "Well, if she is concerned about the plopping sounds she should just take a large wad of toilet paper and put it in the toilet first. You know, like a landing pad."
This is one of those stories that no one except David Sedaris, could really tell and have it be hilarious and not disgusting. Or maybe it was hilarious BECAUSE it was so disgusting?
Anyway, I am here to tell you that I have never shit in my hand. If the situation ever arose that I was in a public restroom and worried about making plopping sounds I would rather that strangers overheard the noise than I have a handful of shit. Sorry. But I have drawn a line in the sand on this one!
It seems 30 years ago a friend of DS told him this story. The friend was dying to go to the bathroom and his father called. So he answered and was talking to his dad.
But he really had to go.
So David Sedaris said to his friend, "so what did you do?"
To which the friend replied, "I shit in my hand." Like it was the most normal thing in the world.
David was shocked and taken aback. But the friend was adament that this was not such a big deal. It was 30 years ago. And we were all tethered to the wall with our phone cords and such.
So years later he is telling this story to a woman friend. And instead of being shocked and taken aback, she says . . . .
"Well, OF COURSE he did! I always shit in my hand. Well, not always, but you know, when I am in a public restroom".
Huh???
"Yes," she went on, "when you are in public you don't want that loud splashy noise going on, so you shit in your hand and then gently drop it in with NO loud splash. Why? Don't you do that?"
*We were all about to fall out of our seats laughing at this story.
Then he goes on to say that he could not believe that everyone shits in their hands and he was the last one to know about this. So when he is on book tours and such and around a lot of people to ask, he now asks people if they shit in their hands. And a couple of days ago he was telling this story and asking someone about their experience with shitting in their hand and the lady behind that person pipes up with this contribution, "Well, if she is concerned about the plopping sounds she should just take a large wad of toilet paper and put it in the toilet first. You know, like a landing pad."
This is one of those stories that no one except David Sedaris, could really tell and have it be hilarious and not disgusting. Or maybe it was hilarious BECAUSE it was so disgusting?
Anyway, I am here to tell you that I have never shit in my hand. If the situation ever arose that I was in a public restroom and worried about making plopping sounds I would rather that strangers overheard the noise than I have a handful of shit. Sorry. But I have drawn a line in the sand on this one!
Thursday, November 3, 2011
David Sedaris
Oh my. Sparky and I went to see David Sedaris last night and it was so much fun. It was well worth every penny. We got there really early, like an hour and a half early, and believe it or don't we found a good parking spot! Gasp! That NEVER happens!
We wander inside the building and right up to a table that is selling DS books. There will be time for a book signing and they wanted to make sure we have all the books we need to be signed. Guess who had to buy more DS books?
All my effing books are either on my Kindle (heart the Kindle) or audio books. No actual books for signing. This might be the biggest drawback to the Kindle. So I chose 2 of my favorites and was just standing around there in the big hallway next to a sign. It said "No Photographs". Maybe people thought I was famous and carried that signage around with me everywhere I go?
Anyhoo, there I am standing and waiting. Sparky had to find the restroom and we were waiting for 2 other people to join us and we had their tickets. So I am standing around being conspicuous. With my sign. And an official-looking lady comes over and says "Good job, being first in line!" And I said "Really?" Then she answered me that "Yes, you are first in line for the early book signing. He is going to do a signing before and after the show."
Yay! I was first in line. So eventually, David Sedaris showed up at the table and asked me to come over. We chatted and it was wonderful. He signed my books. And I rambled on about how I love his books and I have all his books, just on the Kindle, so I had to get new copies so that I could stand in line to get him to sign them. He very cleverly signed one of my books and drew a picture of my Kindle on it and said "There! There's a picture of your Kindle. In case it ever gets stolen you can show this to the police so they will know what it looks like." Heeee!
He signed my second book and drew me a picture of a rabbit wearing glasses. Just because.
Then he asked me who I was with and I called Sparky over and introduced them. And then he gave us some postcards he had made up. One is a picture of a dog skull and skeleton and it says "Pekingese" and the other is like a hand-written sign that says "Abortions $3.00" O. M. G.!!
We stood, we visited, we schmoozed. It was wonderful. I could have gone home right then. But no, we stood around f o r e v e r waiting for the stupid people to open the auditorium doors. Thousands of people milling about in a tiny area outside the doors and it was hot and claustrophobia-inducing and uncomfortable and gross. I kept smelling other people, their breath, their sweat, their heavily-applied colognes and was getting on the verge. You know what I mean?
So, they at long last opened up the auditorium doors and we went in and found our seats. It was airy, cool and fresh in there and praise the Lord for that!
David Sedaris came on stage and was charming, witty and hilarious. He read us stories that are new and not-yet-titled. He read us stories from The New Yorker. And then he read to us from his diaries. Hilarious entries from his diaries. And if that weren't enough he read to us from his favorite new book and I can't even remember this guy's name to pass it on to you. I will ask Sparky tonight and post something about it tomorrow. Then he asked them to raise the lights and did a Q&A just taking random questions from the audience. And you know how in his stories he starts out on one topic and rambles over to here and then there and flits all over and is nowhere near the original paragraph? That is exactly what happened when he was answering questions too. I love that so much!
Tomorrow I will tell you all about a story he shared with us from his diaries. It was hysterically funny, is what it was.
We wander inside the building and right up to a table that is selling DS books. There will be time for a book signing and they wanted to make sure we have all the books we need to be signed. Guess who had to buy more DS books?
All my effing books are either on my Kindle (heart the Kindle) or audio books. No actual books for signing. This might be the biggest drawback to the Kindle. So I chose 2 of my favorites and was just standing around there in the big hallway next to a sign. It said "No Photographs". Maybe people thought I was famous and carried that signage around with me everywhere I go?
Anyhoo, there I am standing and waiting. Sparky had to find the restroom and we were waiting for 2 other people to join us and we had their tickets. So I am standing around being conspicuous. With my sign. And an official-looking lady comes over and says "Good job, being first in line!" And I said "Really?" Then she answered me that "Yes, you are first in line for the early book signing. He is going to do a signing before and after the show."
Yay! I was first in line. So eventually, David Sedaris showed up at the table and asked me to come over. We chatted and it was wonderful. He signed my books. And I rambled on about how I love his books and I have all his books, just on the Kindle, so I had to get new copies so that I could stand in line to get him to sign them. He very cleverly signed one of my books and drew a picture of my Kindle on it and said "There! There's a picture of your Kindle. In case it ever gets stolen you can show this to the police so they will know what it looks like." Heeee!
He signed my second book and drew me a picture of a rabbit wearing glasses. Just because.
Then he asked me who I was with and I called Sparky over and introduced them. And then he gave us some postcards he had made up. One is a picture of a dog skull and skeleton and it says "Pekingese" and the other is like a hand-written sign that says "Abortions $3.00" O. M. G.!!
We stood, we visited, we schmoozed. It was wonderful. I could have gone home right then. But no, we stood around f o r e v e r waiting for the stupid people to open the auditorium doors. Thousands of people milling about in a tiny area outside the doors and it was hot and claustrophobia-inducing and uncomfortable and gross. I kept smelling other people, their breath, their sweat, their heavily-applied colognes and was getting on the verge. You know what I mean?
So, they at long last opened up the auditorium doors and we went in and found our seats. It was airy, cool and fresh in there and praise the Lord for that!
David Sedaris came on stage and was charming, witty and hilarious. He read us stories that are new and not-yet-titled. He read us stories from The New Yorker. And then he read to us from his diaries. Hilarious entries from his diaries. And if that weren't enough he read to us from his favorite new book and I can't even remember this guy's name to pass it on to you. I will ask Sparky tonight and post something about it tomorrow. Then he asked them to raise the lights and did a Q&A just taking random questions from the audience. And you know how in his stories he starts out on one topic and rambles over to here and then there and flits all over and is nowhere near the original paragraph? That is exactly what happened when he was answering questions too. I love that so much!
Tomorrow I will tell you all about a story he shared with us from his diaries. It was hysterically funny, is what it was.
Monday, October 31, 2011
News for the week
News flash #1: It's Halloween! Yay!! We get to see all the little neighbor kidlets running around in costume. We always sit out front with our giant tub o'candy and make them walk the steps up to our front door to get said candy. I know, it seems mean to make little kids go the extra mile but hey, it's either them or us. And they are young and floating on a sugar high. We are old and need our strength.
News flash #2: Wednesday we have tickets to go see David Sedaris! Yay again!! But even more yay!!! I just adore him and I am thrilled to get to see him live.
News flash #3: If seeing David Sedaris isn't enough goodness and excitement, guess who else I get to see next Monday?
Here's a hint: it's another author.
Here's another hint: he's world famous and fabulous.
One more hint: he has written one of the Top Five Books Ever Written.
Ok, last hint: He is the only author out there with a fatwa issued against him by the Ayatollah of Iran.
Yes, indeedy, I will be in the presence of Salman Rushdie one week from today.
In honor of that I am now re-reading The Satanic Verses. This book is just so damn amazing I find it hard to believe it was created by a mere human being. Mr. Rushdie must be on a whole 'nother level of creativity and genius than the humble plane I live on.
It's really easy to be humble when you are going to be face to face with both these creative, clever geniuses.
News flash #4: Sparky has auditioned for and gotten a role in a new play, kind of a one-act show, at his school. Yay for Sparky!!! Which means in addition to all the school work, work study work, other work, meetings, etc. he gets to add daily rehearsals to his way too busy schedule. He's young. He can do this. It's only for 6 - 8 more weeks till the semester ends.
News flash #5: My sister and her very best life-long friend and the friend's sisters and nieces are all going to do the Susan G. Komen 3-day walk, sleep in pink tents, and raise money event this coming week in Dallas. She and the very best friend have been working all year long to build up and be ready for walking 20 something miles each day. They have been so dedicated to this. I am really proud of what they have done. The actual walk will just be icing on the cake.
News flash #6: Today is laundry day. Today is take down the noisy, crappy, old, metal mini-blinds in the bedroom that Angus MacPhee rattles and I hate with a white hot passion. Today is wash those windows behind the blinds and then hang the new and lovely and even better . . . quiet shades. Hurray for quiet shades and clean windows!
News flash #7: The planning for the Thanksgiving feast has begun! We are making lists of the contents of both freezers and going to plan the next month's menus around those items to get rid of them and make room for the turkey. Turkey dinner, it's a beautiful thing.
News flash #2: Wednesday we have tickets to go see David Sedaris! Yay again!! But even more yay!!! I just adore him and I am thrilled to get to see him live.
News flash #3: If seeing David Sedaris isn't enough goodness and excitement, guess who else I get to see next Monday?
Here's a hint: it's another author.
Here's another hint: he's world famous and fabulous.
One more hint: he has written one of the Top Five Books Ever Written.
Ok, last hint: He is the only author out there with a fatwa issued against him by the Ayatollah of Iran.
Yes, indeedy, I will be in the presence of Salman Rushdie one week from today.
In honor of that I am now re-reading The Satanic Verses. This book is just so damn amazing I find it hard to believe it was created by a mere human being. Mr. Rushdie must be on a whole 'nother level of creativity and genius than the humble plane I live on.
It's really easy to be humble when you are going to be face to face with both these creative, clever geniuses.
News flash #4: Sparky has auditioned for and gotten a role in a new play, kind of a one-act show, at his school. Yay for Sparky!!! Which means in addition to all the school work, work study work, other work, meetings, etc. he gets to add daily rehearsals to his way too busy schedule. He's young. He can do this. It's only for 6 - 8 more weeks till the semester ends.
News flash #5: My sister and her very best life-long friend and the friend's sisters and nieces are all going to do the Susan G. Komen 3-day walk, sleep in pink tents, and raise money event this coming week in Dallas. She and the very best friend have been working all year long to build up and be ready for walking 20 something miles each day. They have been so dedicated to this. I am really proud of what they have done. The actual walk will just be icing on the cake.
News flash #6: Today is laundry day. Today is take down the noisy, crappy, old, metal mini-blinds in the bedroom that Angus MacPhee rattles and I hate with a white hot passion. Today is wash those windows behind the blinds and then hang the new and lovely and even better . . . quiet shades. Hurray for quiet shades and clean windows!
News flash #7: The planning for the Thanksgiving feast has begun! We are making lists of the contents of both freezers and going to plan the next month's menus around those items to get rid of them and make room for the turkey. Turkey dinner, it's a beautiful thing.
Saturday, October 29, 2011
Enchiladas, Rice and Beans
You're hungry now, aren't you? Enchiladas, Rice and Beans sounds good, doesn't it?
But I am not here today to talk to you about food. Not food for your body, anyway. You could consider this food for your soul.
This is a book that I have on my shelf. It is honestly one of the best books I have ever read. I bought this book years and years ago, but just last week I pulled it down and am now re-reading it.
As a person who was born to be a lover of all things Mexican, and as a person who has lived either in Mexico or on the border for most of my life this book is truly one that speaks to me. I just adore this book.
Sr. Daniel Reveles has written what I consider to be a piece of art. Actually, each chapter could stand alone as a little vignette, a snapshot of life in a Mexican border town. You will fall in love with each and every person you encounter in your travels through his stories of Tecate.
You know how Northern Exposure made you want to go find the fictional town of Cicely, Alaska and listen to Chris in the morning on the radio? And go to Hollings place to eat and have a beer? That's what this book does for Tecate.
Go to Amazon.com and get yourself a copy. I promise that whenever you find yourself in need of a great book to read to warm your heart and make you roll around laughing and then alternately weep, this book will do that for you. Because when you want to feel warm, cozy and comforted what's better than Enchiladas, Rice and Beans?
But I am not here today to talk to you about food. Not food for your body, anyway. You could consider this food for your soul.
This is a book that I have on my shelf. It is honestly one of the best books I have ever read. I bought this book years and years ago, but just last week I pulled it down and am now re-reading it.
As a person who was born to be a lover of all things Mexican, and as a person who has lived either in Mexico or on the border for most of my life this book is truly one that speaks to me. I just adore this book.
Sr. Daniel Reveles has written what I consider to be a piece of art. Actually, each chapter could stand alone as a little vignette, a snapshot of life in a Mexican border town. You will fall in love with each and every person you encounter in your travels through his stories of Tecate.
You know how Northern Exposure made you want to go find the fictional town of Cicely, Alaska and listen to Chris in the morning on the radio? And go to Hollings place to eat and have a beer? That's what this book does for Tecate.
Go to Amazon.com and get yourself a copy. I promise that whenever you find yourself in need of a great book to read to warm your heart and make you roll around laughing and then alternately weep, this book will do that for you. Because when you want to feel warm, cozy and comforted what's better than Enchiladas, Rice and Beans?
Tuesday, October 25, 2011
Exciting News from Broadway
You know how every one who has ever recorded more than 3 songs now has a musical production being made with a storyline of their music?
Jersey Boys.
Rain.
Billy Joel. (what was the name of that one?)
Mamma Mia
etc., etc., ad nauseum.
I just read in the news that there's another one coming down the pike. Yay! It's gonna be a good one.
Any guesses as to whom?
Well, his name starts with John and ends with Denver!!
JOHN DENVER!
Here is what the article had to say: "A Moment in Time" follows the story of a mortally wounded marine in Afghanistan who recalls a happier time with his family in the Blue Ridge Mountains of Virginia. The project was developed by five-time Tony Award winner Stewart F. Lane, who was recently honored with the 2011 John Denver Spirit Award."
John Denver.
Has there ever been a more universally-loved performer than John Denver? Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE, in the 1970s had someone sing "Annie's Song" at their weddings. That is one of my all time favorite songs. I could listen to it on repeat for hours and hours. (And I have. And I still do!) The emotion always overwhelms me and I end in joyous tears.
The only redeeming thing about that shitty Pauly Shore movie "Son-in-law" was John Denver's "Thank God I'm a Country Boy".
And as far as I am concerned there is nothing that says "Hey, it's Christmas time!" like John Denver and the Muppets singing the Twelve Days of Christmas.
Jersey Boys.
Rain.
Billy Joel. (what was the name of that one?)
Mamma Mia
etc., etc., ad nauseum.
I just read in the news that there's another one coming down the pike. Yay! It's gonna be a good one.
Any guesses as to whom?
Well, his name starts with John and ends with Denver!!
JOHN DENVER!
Here is what the article had to say: "A Moment in Time" follows the story of a mortally wounded marine in Afghanistan who recalls a happier time with his family in the Blue Ridge Mountains of Virginia. The project was developed by five-time Tony Award winner Stewart F. Lane, who was recently honored with the 2011 John Denver Spirit Award."
John Denver.
Has there ever been a more universally-loved performer than John Denver? Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE, in the 1970s had someone sing "Annie's Song" at their weddings. That is one of my all time favorite songs. I could listen to it on repeat for hours and hours. (And I have. And I still do!) The emotion always overwhelms me and I end in joyous tears.
The only redeeming thing about that shitty Pauly Shore movie "Son-in-law" was John Denver's "Thank God I'm a Country Boy".
And as far as I am concerned there is nothing that says "Hey, it's Christmas time!" like John Denver and the Muppets singing the Twelve Days of Christmas.
John Denver took us to the tops of the Rocky Mountains. He took us all under the sea with Jacques Cousteau. And it was his dream to go into space. If he could imagine it, he could sing about it and take us there.
I will leave you with an absolutely gorgeous live version of "Annie's Song" to make your heart swell and send you on your day with joy.
Monday, October 24, 2011
It's been one of those mornings
You know the kind I mean. The kind where you wake up in a bad mood and it goes down hill from there? That kind.
Lately morning has been starting about 5 o'dark thirty, with that no good sorry ass Angus MacPhee deciding it is time for e v e r y o n e to wake up. And wake up the hard way.
What is the hard way, you might ask?
It starts with that little bastard Angus meowing. Then he gets louder "MEEEOOOOW!"
Then he gets this really deep down, open up his throat meow going that gets so loud it's unbelievable!
"Rrrr, rrrrr, mrrrr-ooooowwwwwww!"
We have large industrial-sized squirt bottles filled with watered-down vinegar to blast any pet who gets out of line. And Mr. Big Ed keeps one on his side of the bed at night for just such displays of douchiness. So the morning has started. Angus is yowling and acting like a dick. Mr. Big Ed is squirting the bottle without aiming or opening his eyes and all the other pets are trying to get out of the line of vinegar fire.
Then Angus decides that it is time to move on to Phase Two of his "Kill the Morning Campaign". Phase Two looks like this:
On each side of our bed are night stands. Each with lamps, alarm clocks, various reading materials, glasses of water, eyeglasses, cell phones, house phones. You know, the usual night stand clutter. And right behind those night stands? Long skinny windows with those crappy metal mini-blinds in them.
So Angus bats at the metal blinds (making loads of noise in the process) until he gets them to flip forward enough that he can get in the window behind them and start the yowling process all over again. That way he is up much closer to our heads so we can hear him all the better. And he has his eye on you the whole time so that the minute you raise your head up to try and start throwing the other 4 cats off of the top of the covers so you can get out from underneath them and grab him, he has rattled out of the blinds and headed for the hills.
Sometimes he even goes for Phase Three.
Phase Three looks like Phase Two except for one thing. Instead of going around the back side of the night stands to get into the blinds and make a ruckus?
HE GOES ON TOP OF THE NIGHT STANDS AND KNOCKS ALL THAT SHIT OFF OF THEM!!
If that weren't bad enough, he does it first on one side and then when we get all cleaned up and settled back down,
HE DOES IT TO THE OTHER NIGHT STAND!!
Angus is quickly using up all of his nine lives.
That's how the morning started today. Then I had to get up and take Nikita Babushka (the Husky Princess) outside to pee. While she is out peeing and sniffing the air, I go get Maxwell Banks (the Schnauzer with Alzheimer's) and wake him up to go pee and what do I find? He has woken up early and just peed and shit in the kitchen floor. And then he had stepped in it. And kept walking.
I didn't lose it yet. I was calm and said to myself, "Self, you can just clean this up in just a bit. Get all the dogs out to pee, give the cats their treats and then worry about it." Then I herded Max outside and went to wake up Ernest T. Bass to go outside. (I always sing to him "Ernest T. Bass goes pee pee on the grass")
During the 2 - 3 minutes it took me to go get Ernest T. and walk back towards the back door, Nikita had taken a big shit right in the family room. She had just been outside and walked back inside and shit on my floor. Bitch.
Ernest T. and I stepped around it and I took him outside and brought Max in and was starting to cuss all these damn animals under my breath.
Then I got the paper towels, spray bottle of cleaner, the swiffer and those wet swiffer sheet things and the trash can and was getting ready to clean up all the floors when my phone rang.
I almost didn't answer it, but I saw on the caller i.d. thing that it was my neighbor, The Colonel. Since he turned 90 on Easter this year, I wouldn't feel right ducking his call. What if he or the lovely Miss Betty had fallen or something?
So I answered it. And he started in telling me this story of how their across the street neighbor had called them to tell them that she had seen a strange looking vehicle pull up in their driveway (The Colonel's driveway) and that a black man had gotten out of the car!! Then TC & MB dog, Fifi had set up barking and raising cain so the black man had run back to his car and high-tailed it out of there, taking a section of their retaining wall with him.
So far this is a pretty good story since we do tend to keep the neighborhood in the loop of potential burglaries and such. But then I guess The Col. got comfortable with his story and he started referring to the black man as the n-word. We all know the word. I use a lot of words. I use a lot of really good swear words. Never do I use that word. Never. And it took my poor brain a few seconds to digest the fact that he had in fact, actually said that word. Out loud. And assumed that it was okay to use that word with me.
So I hung up and then looked at all the dog shit and piss I had to clean. And I cleaned it all up and then mopped the floor.
All this BEFORE I had my cup of tea. BEFORE.
I am now drinking my tea and typing about the shitty morning I have had. All of which started with that little douchebag Angus MacPhee. Angus, who likes to sleep all day. Angus, who takes really long cat naps during the day. Angus, who will be woken up every chance I get today. Every time I see that little bastard sleeping I am going to wake him up. Gleefully!
No sleep for Angus!
How's your morning?
Lately morning has been starting about 5 o'dark thirty, with that no good sorry ass Angus MacPhee deciding it is time for e v e r y o n e to wake up. And wake up the hard way.
What is the hard way, you might ask?
It starts with that little bastard Angus meowing. Then he gets louder "MEEEOOOOW!"
Then he gets this really deep down, open up his throat meow going that gets so loud it's unbelievable!
"Rrrr, rrrrr, mrrrr-ooooowwwwwww!"
We have large industrial-sized squirt bottles filled with watered-down vinegar to blast any pet who gets out of line. And Mr. Big Ed keeps one on his side of the bed at night for just such displays of douchiness. So the morning has started. Angus is yowling and acting like a dick. Mr. Big Ed is squirting the bottle without aiming or opening his eyes and all the other pets are trying to get out of the line of vinegar fire.
Then Angus decides that it is time to move on to Phase Two of his "Kill the Morning Campaign". Phase Two looks like this:
On each side of our bed are night stands. Each with lamps, alarm clocks, various reading materials, glasses of water, eyeglasses, cell phones, house phones. You know, the usual night stand clutter. And right behind those night stands? Long skinny windows with those crappy metal mini-blinds in them.
So Angus bats at the metal blinds (making loads of noise in the process) until he gets them to flip forward enough that he can get in the window behind them and start the yowling process all over again. That way he is up much closer to our heads so we can hear him all the better. And he has his eye on you the whole time so that the minute you raise your head up to try and start throwing the other 4 cats off of the top of the covers so you can get out from underneath them and grab him, he has rattled out of the blinds and headed for the hills.
Sometimes he even goes for Phase Three.
Phase Three looks like Phase Two except for one thing. Instead of going around the back side of the night stands to get into the blinds and make a ruckus?
HE GOES ON TOP OF THE NIGHT STANDS AND KNOCKS ALL THAT SHIT OFF OF THEM!!
If that weren't bad enough, he does it first on one side and then when we get all cleaned up and settled back down,
HE DOES IT TO THE OTHER NIGHT STAND!!
Angus is quickly using up all of his nine lives.
That's how the morning started today. Then I had to get up and take Nikita Babushka (the Husky Princess) outside to pee. While she is out peeing and sniffing the air, I go get Maxwell Banks (the Schnauzer with Alzheimer's) and wake him up to go pee and what do I find? He has woken up early and just peed and shit in the kitchen floor. And then he had stepped in it. And kept walking.
I didn't lose it yet. I was calm and said to myself, "Self, you can just clean this up in just a bit. Get all the dogs out to pee, give the cats their treats and then worry about it." Then I herded Max outside and went to wake up Ernest T. Bass to go outside. (I always sing to him "Ernest T. Bass goes pee pee on the grass")
During the 2 - 3 minutes it took me to go get Ernest T. and walk back towards the back door, Nikita had taken a big shit right in the family room. She had just been outside and walked back inside and shit on my floor. Bitch.
Ernest T. and I stepped around it and I took him outside and brought Max in and was starting to cuss all these damn animals under my breath.
Then I got the paper towels, spray bottle of cleaner, the swiffer and those wet swiffer sheet things and the trash can and was getting ready to clean up all the floors when my phone rang.
I almost didn't answer it, but I saw on the caller i.d. thing that it was my neighbor, The Colonel. Since he turned 90 on Easter this year, I wouldn't feel right ducking his call. What if he or the lovely Miss Betty had fallen or something?
So I answered it. And he started in telling me this story of how their across the street neighbor had called them to tell them that she had seen a strange looking vehicle pull up in their driveway (The Colonel's driveway) and that a black man had gotten out of the car!! Then TC & MB dog, Fifi had set up barking and raising cain so the black man had run back to his car and high-tailed it out of there, taking a section of their retaining wall with him.
So far this is a pretty good story since we do tend to keep the neighborhood in the loop of potential burglaries and such. But then I guess The Col. got comfortable with his story and he started referring to the black man as the n-word. We all know the word. I use a lot of words. I use a lot of really good swear words. Never do I use that word. Never. And it took my poor brain a few seconds to digest the fact that he had in fact, actually said that word. Out loud. And assumed that it was okay to use that word with me.
So I hung up and then looked at all the dog shit and piss I had to clean. And I cleaned it all up and then mopped the floor.
All this BEFORE I had my cup of tea. BEFORE.
I am now drinking my tea and typing about the shitty morning I have had. All of which started with that little douchebag Angus MacPhee. Angus, who likes to sleep all day. Angus, who takes really long cat naps during the day. Angus, who will be woken up every chance I get today. Every time I see that little bastard sleeping I am going to wake him up. Gleefully!
No sleep for Angus!
How's your morning?
Saturday, October 22, 2011
We're not number 1!
You know how there is always someone compiling lists and statistics about any and every thing you can imagine? Supposedly, my city is the top rated for binge drinking and also for teen pregnancy. You see a connection there? Maybe a little cause and effect?
This morning I was reading news articles online and came across one that lists the top 10 and bottom 10 for the drunkest states in the union. There is a whole lot of numbers that went into this listing, but I am just going to bottom line the 10 Least Drunk states and then the 10 Most Drunk States.
Least Drunk States
10. Ohio with an average of 32.6 gallons per person
9. Alabama with 30.6 total gallons per person
8. West Virginia with 29.3 g.p.p. (shorter to type 20 times)
7. North Carolina also with 29.3 g.p.p.
6. Oklahoma with 28.9 g.p.p.
5. Kansas with 28.7 g.p.p.
4. Tennessee with 28 g.p.p.
3. Arkansas with 26.6 g.p.p. (personally I think having the Dugger clan in ARK skews their numbers)
2. Kentucky with 26.2 g.p.p.
and drumroll, please . . . . . .
1. Utah!!! with 18.9 g.p.p.
That's quite the drop in consumption between number 2 Kentucky and number 1 Utah, wouldn't you say?
Also, I think it bears noting that lots of these non-boozing states are in the south. The south. Where all the good whiskey is made. They make it but they aren't slamming it back. Interesting.
And this brings us to our Top 10 Drunken Booziest States!
10. Colorado with 34.7 g.p.p. (notice this is almost twice what Utah drinks)
9. Alaska with 35.4 g.p.p. (I would have thought it would be higher)
8. Wyoming with 37.6 g.p.p.
7. Delaware with 38.5 g.p.p. (Delaware??? who woulda thunk it?)
6. North Dakota with 39.3 g.p.p.
5. Wisconsin with 39.5 g.p.p. (Hey, it takes a lot of booze to fuel writing The Onion so consistently funny)
4. Montana with 40.1 g.p.p. (another one I am not surprised at. Hell, this state has the Testicle Festival! You pretty much have to be drunk for that one!)
3. District of Columbia with 41.6 g.p.p.
2. Nevada with 46 g.p.p. (Holy Bikinis, Batman! That's a lot of booze!)
and believe it or don't, the number one spot of Drunkest, Booziest State in the Union goes to . . . . . . .
NEW HAMPSHIRE with 48.7 gallons per person.
I will let that sink in for a minute. New Hampshire beat us. One of the teensiest little states beat our big giant drive-for-days-to-get-across Texas. How did your state rank? Did your state rank in the top or bottom 10?
But I bet those NH teens won't beat out our local girls for most teen pregnancies! We'll always (sadly) have that claim to fame.
This morning I was reading news articles online and came across one that lists the top 10 and bottom 10 for the drunkest states in the union. There is a whole lot of numbers that went into this listing, but I am just going to bottom line the 10 Least Drunk states and then the 10 Most Drunk States.
Least Drunk States
10. Ohio with an average of 32.6 gallons per person
9. Alabama with 30.6 total gallons per person
8. West Virginia with 29.3 g.p.p. (shorter to type 20 times)
7. North Carolina also with 29.3 g.p.p.
6. Oklahoma with 28.9 g.p.p.
5. Kansas with 28.7 g.p.p.
4. Tennessee with 28 g.p.p.
3. Arkansas with 26.6 g.p.p. (personally I think having the Dugger clan in ARK skews their numbers)
2. Kentucky with 26.2 g.p.p.
and drumroll, please . . . . . .
1. Utah!!! with 18.9 g.p.p.
That's quite the drop in consumption between number 2 Kentucky and number 1 Utah, wouldn't you say?
Also, I think it bears noting that lots of these non-boozing states are in the south. The south. Where all the good whiskey is made. They make it but they aren't slamming it back. Interesting.
And this brings us to our Top 10 Drunken Booziest States!
10. Colorado with 34.7 g.p.p. (notice this is almost twice what Utah drinks)
9. Alaska with 35.4 g.p.p. (I would have thought it would be higher)
8. Wyoming with 37.6 g.p.p.
7. Delaware with 38.5 g.p.p. (Delaware??? who woulda thunk it?)
6. North Dakota with 39.3 g.p.p.
5. Wisconsin with 39.5 g.p.p. (Hey, it takes a lot of booze to fuel writing The Onion so consistently funny)
4. Montana with 40.1 g.p.p. (another one I am not surprised at. Hell, this state has the Testicle Festival! You pretty much have to be drunk for that one!)
3. District of Columbia with 41.6 g.p.p.
2. Nevada with 46 g.p.p. (Holy Bikinis, Batman! That's a lot of booze!)
and believe it or don't, the number one spot of Drunkest, Booziest State in the Union goes to . . . . . . .
NEW HAMPSHIRE with 48.7 gallons per person.
I will let that sink in for a minute. New Hampshire beat us. One of the teensiest little states beat our big giant drive-for-days-to-get-across Texas. How did your state rank? Did your state rank in the top or bottom 10?
But I bet those NH teens won't beat out our local girls for most teen pregnancies! We'll always (sadly) have that claim to fame.
Friday, October 21, 2011
A few of my favorite things
It's fall, or autumn, whichever you prefer. Do you capitalize your seasons like they do in German? Some do because they think it is correct. It is technically not capitalized in English, but it does look better as Autumn, doesn't it?
Anyhoo! It is time for the fall/autumnal version of regular items. All the breweries are making their winter/fall/holiday versions of their beers and ales. Yay! Does anyone remember Coors Winterfest? o.m.g. that was such a great beer! Can I find it here? Nope. Do I know if Coors still makes it? Nope.
But I do know that Hershey's has brought back the Pumpkin Spice Kisses! Score!
Have you had these? They are like little bits of pumpkin spicey cheesecake goodness. Get some. And be sure you get a second bag to get you through to Thanksgiving.
While I was at the store scanning the Hershey Kisses I saw these:
However good you think these might be, well, they are a million times better.
Those almonds are delicious. I am thinking that as good as they are all by themselves, they might be excellent in some brittle or other candy recipe. Maybe chopped up and put into some fudge? Maybe tossed in a fall/autumnal salad with some roasted squash or beets?
What about sprinkled on top of some ice cream? Or cheese cake? Or ground up and mixed into a graham cracker crust with a pumpkin cheesecake filling? (I am trying it both ways to see if cheese cake looks better as one word or two.)
What I am saying about the nuts is . . . . . Get some.
You're welcome!
Anyhoo! It is time for the fall/autumnal version of regular items. All the breweries are making their winter/fall/holiday versions of their beers and ales. Yay! Does anyone remember Coors Winterfest? o.m.g. that was such a great beer! Can I find it here? Nope. Do I know if Coors still makes it? Nope.
But I do know that Hershey's has brought back the Pumpkin Spice Kisses! Score!
Have you had these? They are like little bits of pumpkin spicey cheesecake goodness. Get some. And be sure you get a second bag to get you through to Thanksgiving.
While I was at the store scanning the Hershey Kisses I saw these:
However good you think these might be, well, they are a million times better.
Those almonds are delicious. I am thinking that as good as they are all by themselves, they might be excellent in some brittle or other candy recipe. Maybe chopped up and put into some fudge? Maybe tossed in a fall/autumnal salad with some roasted squash or beets?
What about sprinkled on top of some ice cream? Or cheese cake? Or ground up and mixed into a graham cracker crust with a pumpkin cheesecake filling? (I am trying it both ways to see if cheese cake looks better as one word or two.)
What I am saying about the nuts is . . . . . Get some.
You're welcome!
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
It's a photo version of how things go in my head
Believe it or don't there are photos today!!! There will be cute pics and there will be admissions of guilt and stupidity. There will be trips down Memory Lane. And! If that weren't worth the price of admission, you will get to be the first people to see the new table. Yay!!!
So, let's get started, shall we?
Look at my new friend, Scruffy! Isn't he the cutest? Scruffy was on Death Row until my brother-in-law saved his life. Scruffy had just had a bath and I was trying to photograph how his hair just naturally wants to be spikey and mohawk-y.
Next we come to some pictures of the very first house Mr. Big Ed and I bought. Way back in 1983 we bought this little garden home and signed our lives away. I remember clearly hearing the title guy say "Now, you are agreeing to make payments till 2013" and we looked at each other and thought "Whoa! 2013! Damn, that sounds all Space Odyssey in the future!" And all these years later we have moved more times than I care to think about and guess what?
It STILL ISN'T 2013!!! That damn house STILL wouldn't be all ours yet. Good Lord.
But what I want you to notice is the 2 Wild Olive Trees in the front yard. We planted them way back in the day and they were tiny little trees then. They are big, gnarled and gorgeous now. I just adore those olive trees and I would like to have some again. Maybe we should find a place to put them in this yard?
While we were driving around looking at my old house we went by our old church and school. This is where we chose to worship after we were married. This is where my babies were baptized. And also where we chose to start the kids in school. It has also grown and changed over the years.
The first view is from the parking lot looking at the front of the school. It didn't used to be green. To the left of where I was standing is the Parish Hall. And in front and to the right a bit is the actual church.
This one is the church.
And what do we have here? This is the view from my front door waaaaaaay up at the top of the hill looking waaaaaay back down to the street at the delivery truck that brought my new coffee table for the living room.
And here it is!!! Gasp! It took me six years of searching and searching to find this table. Notice anything?
Like maybe it is too f*cking TALL? Like maybe this really isn't a COFFEE TABLE at all????
Like maybe I might have bought the wrong flipping thing? I swear I read that this was a coffee table that the legs could be twisted up to be like a game table and then it opens up to be a spare dining table.
Let me back up to say that I bought this sight unseen. Sort of. I bought it on OneKingsLane where there were pictures and a description page. And that is what I recall about it. That and the fact that I saved $700 for buying it. Whatever.
So I am going to have to go turn this thing over and find out if the legs actually do get shorter and longer or if I am going to have to chalk this up to experience and put it in another place.
I really, really, really don't want to have to tell Mr. Big Ed I could have screwed this up. Cross your fingers for me.
I don't even know what to say about this table business. I mean look at those legs do you see any possible way those things can telescope in on themselves? It's too heavy for me to flip it over all by myself so it will have to wait till Sparky gets home this afternoon before we can start investigating.
You may want to cross more than your fingers on this deal.
So, let's get started, shall we?
Look at my new friend, Scruffy! Isn't he the cutest? Scruffy was on Death Row until my brother-in-law saved his life. Scruffy had just had a bath and I was trying to photograph how his hair just naturally wants to be spikey and mohawk-y.
Next we come to some pictures of the very first house Mr. Big Ed and I bought. Way back in 1983 we bought this little garden home and signed our lives away. I remember clearly hearing the title guy say "Now, you are agreeing to make payments till 2013" and we looked at each other and thought "Whoa! 2013! Damn, that sounds all Space Odyssey in the future!" And all these years later we have moved more times than I care to think about and guess what?
It STILL ISN'T 2013!!! That damn house STILL wouldn't be all ours yet. Good Lord.
But what I want you to notice is the 2 Wild Olive Trees in the front yard. We planted them way back in the day and they were tiny little trees then. They are big, gnarled and gorgeous now. I just adore those olive trees and I would like to have some again. Maybe we should find a place to put them in this yard?
While we were driving around looking at my old house we went by our old church and school. This is where we chose to worship after we were married. This is where my babies were baptized. And also where we chose to start the kids in school. It has also grown and changed over the years.
The first view is from the parking lot looking at the front of the school. It didn't used to be green. To the left of where I was standing is the Parish Hall. And in front and to the right a bit is the actual church.
This one is the church.
And what do we have here? This is the view from my front door waaaaaaay up at the top of the hill looking waaaaaay back down to the street at the delivery truck that brought my new coffee table for the living room.
And here it is!!! Gasp! It took me six years of searching and searching to find this table. Notice anything?
Like maybe it is too f*cking TALL? Like maybe this really isn't a COFFEE TABLE at all????
Like maybe I might have bought the wrong flipping thing? I swear I read that this was a coffee table that the legs could be twisted up to be like a game table and then it opens up to be a spare dining table.
Let me back up to say that I bought this sight unseen. Sort of. I bought it on OneKingsLane where there were pictures and a description page. And that is what I recall about it. That and the fact that I saved $700 for buying it. Whatever.
So I am going to have to go turn this thing over and find out if the legs actually do get shorter and longer or if I am going to have to chalk this up to experience and put it in another place.
I really, really, really don't want to have to tell Mr. Big Ed I could have screwed this up. Cross your fingers for me.
I don't even know what to say about this table business. I mean look at those legs do you see any possible way those things can telescope in on themselves? It's too heavy for me to flip it over all by myself so it will have to wait till Sparky gets home this afternoon before we can start investigating.
You may want to cross more than your fingers on this deal.
Lockout Schlockout
Dear NBA,
We, your adoring and ardent fans, beseech you to get your shit together. Enough is enough. Everyone knows it's always the fault of the other party when 2 sides can't come together in peace, love, and harmony.
But, who is really paying the price for this dick-measuring debacle? While you are waiting for the other side to flinch, blink and say Uncle, who is losing out? Hmmm?
Would it be us, the fans?
Why yes, it would!
And here's a little heads up for you:
If you keep this shit up you are going to LOSE fans! Left and right, people will quit caring.
Right now, do I know where any of my beloved Spurs are? Nope.
Do I care? Just a little. And a little less than I cared last week. And less than the week before.
So, as a mom I have this to say, "Get back to work. Get back to doing what you signed up to do. Quit being greedy bastards. And if there are less asses in the seats for your games when you do start up again, that is the price you will have to pay. And there will be major sucking up you will have to do to help your fan base remember why they liked you in the first damn place. I will say this one more time, Get. back. to. work. Enough is enough, already."
Most sincerely,
Lisa Pie who finds herself less and less of a fan as time goes by
We, your adoring and ardent fans, beseech you to get your shit together. Enough is enough. Everyone knows it's always the fault of the other party when 2 sides can't come together in peace, love, and harmony.
But, who is really paying the price for this dick-measuring debacle? While you are waiting for the other side to flinch, blink and say Uncle, who is losing out? Hmmm?
Would it be us, the fans?
Why yes, it would!
And here's a little heads up for you:
If you keep this shit up you are going to LOSE fans! Left and right, people will quit caring.
Right now, do I know where any of my beloved Spurs are? Nope.
Do I care? Just a little. And a little less than I cared last week. And less than the week before.
So, as a mom I have this to say, "Get back to work. Get back to doing what you signed up to do. Quit being greedy bastards. And if there are less asses in the seats for your games when you do start up again, that is the price you will have to pay. And there will be major sucking up you will have to do to help your fan base remember why they liked you in the first damn place. I will say this one more time, Get. back. to. work. Enough is enough, already."
Most sincerely,
Lisa Pie who finds herself less and less of a fan as time goes by
Monday, October 17, 2011
It's that time again!
Ok, you know how the name of this here blog is LisaPie's Musings, Ramblings & Rants??
Today is kind of a Ranting day. Aren't you glad you tuned in after I have taken a 2 week long hiatus?
Things on my Rant/Bitch List:
1. Idiots on Jeopardy!, pay attention! Listen closely.
THE WORD IS HUNDRED. hunDRED.
It is NOT Hunnerd. If you say hunnerd, you should be disqualified and be forced to let Alex Trebek talk to you non-stop for 3 full weeks. Quit saying hunnerd, you lower your iq by a hunDRED points every time you do it.
2. When you abbreviate things as we all do, would it kill you to use the correct "Fridge" for refrigerator rather than Frig?? Makes me want to say "What frigging thing are you talking about now?"
3. I read a book this past weekend. It was a small paperback that I found in the bottom of an overnight bag I hadn't used in a couple years. I have no idea where this book came from. Certainly someone passed it on to me because I didn't buy it. It was fair to middling. If I were grading it I would give it a C-. The reason I bring it up at all is the typos!
Did I ever tell you that in a former life I used to work in printing? I did typesetting and proofreading. I loved it. It was a really fun job. It was all creative, fun and yet very precise at the same time. Since everything has gone to the digital age and proofreaders have become as obselete as real corks in real wine bottles, it seems that standards have also fallen by the wayside.
I don't care what you are reading, a blog, a newspaper, an obituary, a crummy paperback, a novel from a very talented author, or a comic book; there will be a typo. Magazines have them. Menus? They are the WORST! Oh Lordy, reading a menu can be excruciating!
What the hell is wrong with people? No one cares?
And saying this I know full well that someone will comment and point out a rather glaring misspelling of my very own. This is my own failing when I get all excited, flustered and on my high horse about something and then just push the button for Publish Post rather than spell check first. So that's okay. I understand that about myself and I hope that you will take this blog with it's grammatical failings for what it is, just my little way of sharing a bit of myself. Warts and all, as they say.
4. The last thing I want to rant/bitch about is people lacking basic kindness for our fellow man. Can we please be kind and considerate with each other? You and I don't know what the person in the next house/office/car are going through. Would it kill us to be nice? Can't we let that person merge into our lane? Can we see that it's not all about us? The world does not revolve around you, or me. Let's just find a way to treat each other with the respect and consideration that we would like our mothers and children to have. I would say "as you would like to be treated", but there are a ton of people out there who don't really care about themselves and get trampled on a daily basis, but they would stand up for their loved ones.
That's it. I am done bitching today. I am sorry that I have taken such a break from this blog and you have probably lost all interest. Things have just not been easy around here and I couldn't come up with anything positive to say. My next post will be much sooner and it will positive. Promise.
Thanks for listening.
Today is kind of a Ranting day. Aren't you glad you tuned in after I have taken a 2 week long hiatus?
Things on my Rant/Bitch List:
1. Idiots on Jeopardy!, pay attention! Listen closely.
THE WORD IS HUNDRED. hunDRED.
It is NOT Hunnerd. If you say hunnerd, you should be disqualified and be forced to let Alex Trebek talk to you non-stop for 3 full weeks. Quit saying hunnerd, you lower your iq by a hunDRED points every time you do it.
2. When you abbreviate things as we all do, would it kill you to use the correct "Fridge" for refrigerator rather than Frig?? Makes me want to say "What frigging thing are you talking about now?"
3. I read a book this past weekend. It was a small paperback that I found in the bottom of an overnight bag I hadn't used in a couple years. I have no idea where this book came from. Certainly someone passed it on to me because I didn't buy it. It was fair to middling. If I were grading it I would give it a C-. The reason I bring it up at all is the typos!
Did I ever tell you that in a former life I used to work in printing? I did typesetting and proofreading. I loved it. It was a really fun job. It was all creative, fun and yet very precise at the same time. Since everything has gone to the digital age and proofreaders have become as obselete as real corks in real wine bottles, it seems that standards have also fallen by the wayside.
I don't care what you are reading, a blog, a newspaper, an obituary, a crummy paperback, a novel from a very talented author, or a comic book; there will be a typo. Magazines have them. Menus? They are the WORST! Oh Lordy, reading a menu can be excruciating!
What the hell is wrong with people? No one cares?
And saying this I know full well that someone will comment and point out a rather glaring misspelling of my very own. This is my own failing when I get all excited, flustered and on my high horse about something and then just push the button for Publish Post rather than spell check first. So that's okay. I understand that about myself and I hope that you will take this blog with it's grammatical failings for what it is, just my little way of sharing a bit of myself. Warts and all, as they say.
4. The last thing I want to rant/bitch about is people lacking basic kindness for our fellow man. Can we please be kind and considerate with each other? You and I don't know what the person in the next house/office/car are going through. Would it kill us to be nice? Can't we let that person merge into our lane? Can we see that it's not all about us? The world does not revolve around you, or me. Let's just find a way to treat each other with the respect and consideration that we would like our mothers and children to have. I would say "as you would like to be treated", but there are a ton of people out there who don't really care about themselves and get trampled on a daily basis, but they would stand up for their loved ones.
That's it. I am done bitching today. I am sorry that I have taken such a break from this blog and you have probably lost all interest. Things have just not been easy around here and I couldn't come up with anything positive to say. My next post will be much sooner and it will positive. Promise.
Thanks for listening.
Tuesday, October 4, 2011
Recipes!
Recently I mentioned making King Ranch Chicken which is a staple in Texas. Everyone makes it, everyone knows how to make it and as per usual, everyone does it just a wee bit different. And someone asked for the recipe.
So I am here to share the recipe with you. And also I am going to give you one that is even better.
Here is my thinking on this: As I said above, everyone in Texas makes the King Ranch Chicken casserole which gets its name from the King Ranch. Supposedly a cook on the ranch put this together and that's how it came to be known as King Ranch Chicken. *And could I say King Ranch any more times in this paragraph?
But before I go further in my story about these 2 recipes I want to give you the link to the actual King Ranch . Just in case you want to peruse this fine establishment and see what's what on their site. The King Ranch is the largest ranch in the whole wide world. It is bigger than many of the east coast small-ish states.
So with the King Ranch Chicken casserole, it's one of those recipes that evolved over time. I am sure way back in the day when the cook first made this he/she did NOT run right out to the store to get a couple of canned goods to get started. On a property with that many thousands and thousands of acres you don't run right out for anything. So it makes sense that it was probably made with from-scratch items and then when it became popular it was easier to get home cooks to make this using store-bought cans to make a few shortcuts.
I have made this and eaten this my whole life. And when we moved to Guadalajara I took a TON of different cooking classes. One set of which were taught by a neighbor of mine, the late Maria Machuca. She was a very talented cook and a great teacher. She taught me to make a Mexican tradition known as Chilequiles. The first time I tasted it I knew immediately that this is what the King Ranch Chicken was trying to imitate. The cook probably had come from Mexico and had the recipe or the taste memory of the Chilequiles and wanted to recreate it with local ingredients available.
So I am giving you both, the King Ranch Chicken and Maria's recipe for Chilequiles. Try them both and see what you think.
King Ranch Chicken
1 3-lb. chicken, cut up
2 cans cream soup (can be mushroom, chicken, celery. I usually do one mushroom and one chicken)
1 can Ro-Tel diced tomatoes with chiles
1 dozen corn tortillas, cut into wedges (much like a pizza or a Trivial Pursuit game piece)
2 cups cheese, grated
Boil the chicken with some celery, parsley, garlic, onion or whatever you like to flavor the meat. You are going to use a bit of the broth in the recipe, as well. After the chicken is cooked and cooled, debone and cut or tear the meat into bite-sized pieces.
Combine the cans of soup with the Ro-Tel and about a cup or so of the broth and mix till smooth.
In a large casserole or a 9x13 pyrex pan, layer up tortillas, chicken, cheese, soup mixture, tortillas, chicken, the rest of the soup and then top with the rest of the cheese.
Cover with foil and bake at 350 F for about 1 hour. I usually take the foil off the last 15 minutes and let the cheese brown a bit for the last part of the cooking.
Sounds good, right? It is.
Now here is the recipe for the Chilequiles
2 pkg of corn tortillas (I usually go with about 24 - 36), cut into the same wedges
1/2 liter heavy cream or sour cream
1/2 kilo shredded Mexican Manchego cheese or a good Monterrey Jack or Mozzarella (you want the melty stretchiness)
3/4 kilo green tomatillos
6 small green serrano peppers
1 small wedge of onion
3 cloves garlic, peeled
1 1/2 cups cilantro
In a good-sized saucepan cover the tomatillos with water. Add the peppers, onion and garlic. Boil until water darkens, about 10 minutes.
After you have cut the tortillas into wedges, heat some oil in a frying pan and fry them till crispy and golden. Spread on paper towels to drain and sprinkle with salt. (try to not eat them all!)
Shred the cheese.
Let the tomatillos and peppers cool a bit. Then put the tomatillos, and 3 of the peppers and the onion and garlic into the blender or food processor. Add a bit of salt and the cilantro. Blend with 1 1/2 cups of the water they were boiled in. *This is going to make way more green salsa than you will need for this dish. Don't try to use it all or your Chilequiles will be swimming and soggy.
In a 9x13 pyrex layer tortillas, green sauce and cream. Repeat layers and top with the shredded cheese.
Bake until bubbly and heated through.
***Now here is the deal with Chilequiles. This is a dish made to use up the leftover tortillas from yesterday that are not all soft and pliable. This dish is often made with shredded leftover chicken in the layers. I also put half the cheese in the middle and half on top.
We like to make this with leftover smoked chicken too. It's very good.
This dish is served all over Mexico with refried beans and sliced avocado. You can order it for breakfast, brunch or lunch. Some places ask you if you want yours made with green or red sauce. I prefer the green.
And by the way, that green sauce in the recipe up there? That is killer! It is so darn good you will want to keep dipping those fresh hot tortilla chips in it. So, if you want to be really traditional when you serve this sauce at your table, dice up a couple of really firm and ripe Haas avocados and mix them in. Now, THAT is a beautiful thing right there.
Please, try both of these dishes and let me know how it goes for you and if you have a preference.
¡Buen Provecho!
So I am here to share the recipe with you. And also I am going to give you one that is even better.
Here is my thinking on this: As I said above, everyone in Texas makes the King Ranch Chicken casserole which gets its name from the King Ranch. Supposedly a cook on the ranch put this together and that's how it came to be known as King Ranch Chicken. *And could I say King Ranch any more times in this paragraph?
But before I go further in my story about these 2 recipes I want to give you the link to the actual King Ranch . Just in case you want to peruse this fine establishment and see what's what on their site. The King Ranch is the largest ranch in the whole wide world. It is bigger than many of the east coast small-ish states.
So with the King Ranch Chicken casserole, it's one of those recipes that evolved over time. I am sure way back in the day when the cook first made this he/she did NOT run right out to the store to get a couple of canned goods to get started. On a property with that many thousands and thousands of acres you don't run right out for anything. So it makes sense that it was probably made with from-scratch items and then when it became popular it was easier to get home cooks to make this using store-bought cans to make a few shortcuts.
I have made this and eaten this my whole life. And when we moved to Guadalajara I took a TON of different cooking classes. One set of which were taught by a neighbor of mine, the late Maria Machuca. She was a very talented cook and a great teacher. She taught me to make a Mexican tradition known as Chilequiles. The first time I tasted it I knew immediately that this is what the King Ranch Chicken was trying to imitate. The cook probably had come from Mexico and had the recipe or the taste memory of the Chilequiles and wanted to recreate it with local ingredients available.
So I am giving you both, the King Ranch Chicken and Maria's recipe for Chilequiles. Try them both and see what you think.
King Ranch Chicken
1 3-lb. chicken, cut up
2 cans cream soup (can be mushroom, chicken, celery. I usually do one mushroom and one chicken)
1 can Ro-Tel diced tomatoes with chiles
1 dozen corn tortillas, cut into wedges (much like a pizza or a Trivial Pursuit game piece)
2 cups cheese, grated
Boil the chicken with some celery, parsley, garlic, onion or whatever you like to flavor the meat. You are going to use a bit of the broth in the recipe, as well. After the chicken is cooked and cooled, debone and cut or tear the meat into bite-sized pieces.
Combine the cans of soup with the Ro-Tel and about a cup or so of the broth and mix till smooth.
In a large casserole or a 9x13 pyrex pan, layer up tortillas, chicken, cheese, soup mixture, tortillas, chicken, the rest of the soup and then top with the rest of the cheese.
Cover with foil and bake at 350 F for about 1 hour. I usually take the foil off the last 15 minutes and let the cheese brown a bit for the last part of the cooking.
Sounds good, right? It is.
Now here is the recipe for the Chilequiles
2 pkg of corn tortillas (I usually go with about 24 - 36), cut into the same wedges
1/2 liter heavy cream or sour cream
1/2 kilo shredded Mexican Manchego cheese or a good Monterrey Jack or Mozzarella (you want the melty stretchiness)
3/4 kilo green tomatillos
6 small green serrano peppers
1 small wedge of onion
3 cloves garlic, peeled
1 1/2 cups cilantro
In a good-sized saucepan cover the tomatillos with water. Add the peppers, onion and garlic. Boil until water darkens, about 10 minutes.
After you have cut the tortillas into wedges, heat some oil in a frying pan and fry them till crispy and golden. Spread on paper towels to drain and sprinkle with salt. (try to not eat them all!)
Shred the cheese.
Let the tomatillos and peppers cool a bit. Then put the tomatillos, and 3 of the peppers and the onion and garlic into the blender or food processor. Add a bit of salt and the cilantro. Blend with 1 1/2 cups of the water they were boiled in. *This is going to make way more green salsa than you will need for this dish. Don't try to use it all or your Chilequiles will be swimming and soggy.
In a 9x13 pyrex layer tortillas, green sauce and cream. Repeat layers and top with the shredded cheese.
Bake until bubbly and heated through.
***Now here is the deal with Chilequiles. This is a dish made to use up the leftover tortillas from yesterday that are not all soft and pliable. This dish is often made with shredded leftover chicken in the layers. I also put half the cheese in the middle and half on top.
We like to make this with leftover smoked chicken too. It's very good.
This dish is served all over Mexico with refried beans and sliced avocado. You can order it for breakfast, brunch or lunch. Some places ask you if you want yours made with green or red sauce. I prefer the green.
And by the way, that green sauce in the recipe up there? That is killer! It is so darn good you will want to keep dipping those fresh hot tortilla chips in it. So, if you want to be really traditional when you serve this sauce at your table, dice up a couple of really firm and ripe Haas avocados and mix them in. Now, THAT is a beautiful thing right there.
Please, try both of these dishes and let me know how it goes for you and if you have a preference.
¡Buen Provecho!
Thursday, September 29, 2011
Another quick t.v. update
I know, two posts about t.v. in a row. Three if you count the SNL video clip. But sometimes you gotta go with what you got!
Did any of you see the finale/cliff hanger of The Big C?
I really hate to ruin it for you in case you haven't. So consider this your
***SPOILER ALERT***
What on earth are they doing to us? Last season they killed off Marlene. This season they have let Rebecca miscarry with a whole big funeral hullabaloo afterwards, then Lee died. Oh, and I really liked Lee. What's not to like? Gorgeous, witty, hilariously funny, very centered and a bit of a wine snob. He was perfect!
Just dying of cancer. And so they killed him off.
So I am rocking along thinking everyone else on this season is safe. They have already had the prerequisite death scene(s). And I actually didn't even think of it as the season finale when I was watching it. Which means I was completely caught off guard for what happened at the end.
Cathy is running a marathon in Lee's name. In St. Paul. On New Year's Eve. It's colder than cold and she is suffering and just not doing well. Her cute oncologist and her son are there cheering for her. And then Sean shows up. And they see her coming to the finish line. They are all clapping and cheering and waving her on.
She looks up and sees this and then sees Marlene near them. (she has seen Marlene many times over the course of this season so nothing new there)
But then Lee walks up next to Marlene. Awww. It was so touching to see her two best dead friends there together.
Finally, her husband (played by the imcomparable Oliver Platt) gets there (he has been over at the insurance company arguing with them over not covering all of her bills. Seems that he hasn't done very well getting them to honor their obligations what with yelling at the claims lady and calling her a C*nt, so he decides to go bust in on their New Year's Eve party). So he gets there and is standing next to the son, the brother, and the handsome doctor. She waves and says "You all made it!" To which Adam, the son, says "Except for dad. Where is he?"
Cathy is all confused. Why does Adam think his dad isn't there? He's right there! Can't he see him? And she looks over at the two dead friends that she knows no one else can see, and looks at Paul.
And realizes no one else sees him either.
Holy Shit!
That face says it all. Paul thinks he has just arrived to watch her finish. Paul thinks he is still alive. Paul is just about to realize that he didn't make it out of the insurance office. And that Cathy is the only one who can see him.
I think Marlene and Lee see him but I couldn't tell if Paul had seen them yet. Or if he could.
O.M.G. people! I swear to you I had tears streaming down my face through out this whole scene.
This is Cathy's face as she is seeing all the men in her life there cheering her on. Just before the big realization oozes over her.
This could not be a more moving and emotional season 2 finale. I am sitting there crying and Sparky looks at me and says, "I am sure he's not dead. They are probably going to be able to revive him."
Isn't that sweet? He didn't want me to be sad for the next year till Season 3 starts up. But even I am not gullible enough to think they could pull that one off.
This is a fantastic show. And even if they kill off one of my favorite actors, with this show, they keep bringing back in the dead folks, so I won't cry too much.
Did any of you see the finale/cliff hanger of The Big C?
I really hate to ruin it for you in case you haven't. So consider this your
***SPOILER ALERT***
What on earth are they doing to us? Last season they killed off Marlene. This season they have let Rebecca miscarry with a whole big funeral hullabaloo afterwards, then Lee died. Oh, and I really liked Lee. What's not to like? Gorgeous, witty, hilariously funny, very centered and a bit of a wine snob. He was perfect!
Just dying of cancer. And so they killed him off.
So I am rocking along thinking everyone else on this season is safe. They have already had the prerequisite death scene(s). And I actually didn't even think of it as the season finale when I was watching it. Which means I was completely caught off guard for what happened at the end.
Cathy is running a marathon in Lee's name. In St. Paul. On New Year's Eve. It's colder than cold and she is suffering and just not doing well. Her cute oncologist and her son are there cheering for her. And then Sean shows up. And they see her coming to the finish line. They are all clapping and cheering and waving her on.
She looks up and sees this and then sees Marlene near them. (she has seen Marlene many times over the course of this season so nothing new there)
But then Lee walks up next to Marlene. Awww. It was so touching to see her two best dead friends there together.
Finally, her husband (played by the imcomparable Oliver Platt) gets there (he has been over at the insurance company arguing with them over not covering all of her bills. Seems that he hasn't done very well getting them to honor their obligations what with yelling at the claims lady and calling her a C*nt, so he decides to go bust in on their New Year's Eve party). So he gets there and is standing next to the son, the brother, and the handsome doctor. She waves and says "You all made it!" To which Adam, the son, says "Except for dad. Where is he?"
Cathy is all confused. Why does Adam think his dad isn't there? He's right there! Can't he see him? And she looks over at the two dead friends that she knows no one else can see, and looks at Paul.
And realizes no one else sees him either.
Holy Shit!
That face says it all. Paul thinks he has just arrived to watch her finish. Paul thinks he is still alive. Paul is just about to realize that he didn't make it out of the insurance office. And that Cathy is the only one who can see him.
I think Marlene and Lee see him but I couldn't tell if Paul had seen them yet. Or if he could.
O.M.G. people! I swear to you I had tears streaming down my face through out this whole scene.
This is Cathy's face as she is seeing all the men in her life there cheering her on. Just before the big realization oozes over her.
This could not be a more moving and emotional season 2 finale. I am sitting there crying and Sparky looks at me and says, "I am sure he's not dead. They are probably going to be able to revive him."
Isn't that sweet? He didn't want me to be sad for the next year till Season 3 starts up. But even I am not gullible enough to think they could pull that one off.
This is a fantastic show. And even if they kill off one of my favorite actors, with this show, they keep bringing back in the dead folks, so I won't cry too much.
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