Serial Killer Strikes Again

It started out like any regular normal morning.  I got up and made myself a cup of tea. I came into the office to do the morning ritual of reading email, blogs, news, etc.  And as usual there were any number of cats perched on all the cat furniture things in front of the window.  

Then I heard it.  A sad, plaintive, mournful cry.  Where was it coming from?  I got up and looked in each room.  I looked in the closet just in case one of the cats had gotten themselves stuck in there.   Finally I was able to discern that it was coming from outside.  Aha!  Some stupid cat had snuck out when someone was on their way to work.  Bad kitty!  

I never let the cats out before noon.  The morning time is when the early birds are getting the worms, or bugs or whatever the hell it is that the early birds get.  And it is unfair for these cats to go out there and upset the balance and start killing off birds who are just getting their breakfast on.

Back to the story.  I couldn't figure out the sound, but I opened the front door and in trotted Angus MacPhee.  Angus "the serial bird killer" MacPhee.  Bad Angus.  And he has a "mostly dead" bird in his jaws and is going "Mmmm Rowwwr" which sounds like he is trying to meow with a bird in his mouth and it is coming out more like he is gargling.  I then had to scoop up the killer and the victim and toss them both outside.  Sorry, I know someone is going to ask why I didn't try to save the bird, but I have done this too many times and it always ends badly.  Better to get the killing over with quickly rather than to let him linger in pain while the damn cat keeps batting it around.  Oh, that Angus is a wee little killer.  He is all small and cute.  Skinny, stripey, scrappy and feisty, he is.  A cute, skinny, killing machine.

After I tossed his killing ass back outside, he went right back to yowling/gargling "mmmrowwr" at the front door.  Like a freaky homicidal maniac trying to get in. Or maybe like a stalker cat who wants to show off his kill to the other fatter, lazier cats who slept in.

And now?  It is the afternoon and Ole Killer McKillerstein is curled up taking a nap.  But where is his brother?  Yes, Angus MacPhee has a brother.  His name is Fergus Jackson MacPhee.  At last check Fergus was outside playing with the dead bird.  Rolling around with it, throwing it up in the air, and trying to get it to "play" some more.  That poor bird has had a bad day, is what he has had.

You should be thankful that I decided today would not be a blog-with-pictures kind of day.  

Birds

You know, it is funny. Strange funny, not ha ha funny, I never really considered myself a "bird person". One of those people with a bizarre attachment to birds in cages in my house, that kind of bird person.

But I started noticing all the birds every time we moved. Each place had its own unique wildlife, birds included. Our first move was to Guadalajara and I was so entranced with the trees, flowers, houses and all the color I never really noticed the birds. We had boatloads of squirrels, that's for sure!

Then we moved to Monterrey, Mexico (not to be confused with the beautiful Monterey on the coast of California). Monterrey is a Beige city. All the mountains around there were strip mined so they are beige, there is massive pollution and the air is beige, and the complete opposite of Guadalajara where people wanted their homes to stand out, these houses were all various shades of beige. Did I mention that the beige polluted air smelled to high heaven? It did. I remember clearly lying in bed and my first waking thought was, "What on earth is that smell???" It was the air. Gross.

Anyhoo, back to birds. So in the midst of all this beige nonsense, we had a huge gigantic pecan tree in our back yard. And every day we had a flock of small green parrots who would fly in from heaven only knows where and come to collect pecans. It was like they all left home at the same time, came to get food and then in the late afternoon about 5-ish they would all fly home with pecans in their feet. Some of them would squawk really loudly so you would remember to look up and watch them, and some of them would be morons and drop their pecans. So you better be looking up so that you don't get beaned with a falling nut! They would hit the patio with a resounding THUD! I loved those parrots!

In South America we had loads of birds in our various locations, but I didn't know the names of most of them. It was when we moved to Mexico City that I became fascinated with the hummingbirds. We had more hummingbirds than I can ever remember seeing! Let's put it this way, there were almost as many hummingbirds as there were VW Beetle Taxis. Ha! Now, you know how many I am talking about. I spent a lot of time buying hummingbird feeders, making up the solution and sitting at my window watching them. They are so beautiful and unbeknownst to me, quite feisty! I like them!

At our home in Minnesota I was so in love with the Canadian geese. People kept telling me I would get sick of them but no, I can't imagine that happening. They were so beautiful and such good parents to the little guys.

Here at our current home we live in an area with tons of birds! I love watching them. I was picturing myself the other day dressed up like Miss Jane from the Beverly Hillbillies when she was birdwatching with Wally Cox. The big hat, the khaki shorts with tons of pockets, the big binoculars and cameras, books, etc, all at the ready. I already have the binoculars and a hat, so I am on my way!

I like to watch the birds but I don't want to put any feeders out or anything to attract them. I do have 5 cats and 3 dogs that have all shown their penchant for bird killing. Right now I most enjoy the cardinals and the hawks. We also have blue jays, woodpeckers, various sparrows, dove, nasty grackles, mockingbirds, and some really slow type of bird that my cats keep getting and I have to take to the Wildlife Rescue place. I forget their name, I think it is phoebe.

But my favorite is the big hoot owl that roosts outside my bedroom window at night. He is supposedly a giant barn owl and goes like this, "Whoo, hoo, hooooo. Who, who, whoooooooo". I love to lay in bed at night and read and when the house is really quiet and Mr. Big Ed is not snoring his head off, I listen to the hoot owl.

This is why I make sure all my cats are in before dark. The Wildlife Rescue place said that owls can carry off huge housepets. They also said that the owls will decapitate their prey and pull their guts out of their necks. Now, who wants to wake up and find Fluffy all headless and gutless on the front lawn? Not me, that is for sure!

In the grand scheme of things, isn't it karmic that after the cats are busy killing off the smaller birds during the day that the owls get a crack at them after dark? Hmmm?? This is why I try my best to keep my critters out of the food chain, the circle of life, and all that.

Do you have birds in your neck of the woods? Do you like them? Do you like wild birds or the kind in cages in your own home?

A little of this, a little of that

Yesterday was St. Paddy's Day and I tried several times to post something new and my keyboard was acting all weird and it never worked. Today seems good (knocking on wood so I don't jinx that!) so here goes!

Sunday night I saw the reunion show of all the Tools from Tool Academy and I have to say, I think most of those guys and some of the girls are all STILL TOOLS! Maybe a tool can't change it's handle? or purpose? or some other thing that makes this like "a leopard can't change it's spots". Whatever. Anyhoo, the one guy with the horrible Flock of Seagulls 1980's hairdo who started the show with one girlfriend and then had another girl show up and claim she was the real girlfriend was there with BOTH the girls. It turns out he isn't with either one (that's cause he is a TOOL!!) and while they are interviewing him and the has-been girlfriends a new girl shows up and announces that she is pregnant with his baby! Ha! I love it! Thank heavens none of the other girlfriends wanted him, but this one didn't really want him either. What I want to know is how on earth this guy who looks like a total douche with such bad hair gets girls all the time? How does this happen? Are there that many girls out there who have no self esteem at all who would buy in to his line of bullshit? Apparently there are. At least wherever it is he lives.

The couple who won and got married are still married and seem happy. And they announced there will a new season coming this year. So stay tuned for even more Tools!

I am still not over the lame last episode of The L Word and I can't say any more than that because Rachel Pie has not bothered to watch it yet and we haven't discussed it and done a thorough post-mortem. And until that happens, my lips are sealed. So Rachel Pie, quit playing around with your going to classes, your doing homework for hours each day, your going to see friends, your going to the grocery store, all that silly stuff you do that keeps you from watching this show and talking to me. :) Priorities and all that.

I ordered my new Mah Jongg cards for the year and I can't wait till they get here! New hands to play, woo hoo! Lordy, do I lead an exciting life.

Early this morning I was looking out my front window and watching the birds. We have more variety of birds in this neighborhood than I have ever seen. And there were at least 3 new little cardinals flying and hopping around the trees. They must be little fledglings that hatched already. And they were so cute! What is cuter than a red cardinal? So as I was looking out I was also making a mental note to not let the cats out today so that the birds have a fair chance, and I noticed that right in front of my face on the window screen was a giant, huge spider. All this time I was looking at what was at a distance and not noticing what was up close. That spider was huge! Either a huge spider or a small tarantula. I am going to have to go out there and check it out. And regardless, the cats are definitely NOT going out today! Too bad for them.

It is bright and sunny and warm out today and all the more apparent that Spring has sprung. I am having Spring Cleaning dreams. In my dreams I am an organizing fool. In real life, not so much.