Girl, you just won't beLIEVE what happened!

So, I was out to lunch with some friends as you do sometimes.  And we went to a new place to check it out.  (I am giving it a B for food and a D for service)  We were sitting in the back in a semi-private area with a big table as there were quite a few of us.  What we didn't know was that when they seated us in the back that they were going to forget about us most of the time.  I mean seriously, forget about us. We were parched in between waiting for refills of iced tea.

Anyhoo, we were enjoying our leisurely lunch and then the power went out.  POOF!  No power. We were next to a bunch of windows so we could see but it's still that weird, creepy feeling with a little anxiety of what is going to happen next.  A few minutes later the power came back on and the waitress stuck her head in to see if we were still kicking and said "Did y'all go outside?"

Huh?

"Uh no, we didn't. What are you talking about?"

"Oh, I thought you might have gone outside.  When the power blew it was because the two big tall palm trees out front by the street, they just caught on fire.  Like spontaneously combusted."

What the fuck???? But what I said was "Well, that's certainly odd behavior for a palm tree."

"Oh yeah, the fire department is out there, the power company is out there and everything."

And again, my brain just kept going "What the fuck is she talking about??"

Then I had the presence of mind to ask whether any cars in the parking lot out front were damaged.  She said no, but I didn't trust her judgment.  Hell, she didn't even remember we were there half the time. So, we quickly wrapped up the splitting of the bill and headed out front to see what was what.

Here is what we saw:

Smoking trees that self-combusted

Firetruck blocking traffic from driving directly under combusted trees

Methinks the power lines may have played a role in the combustion?

the tree on the left is still smoking out the middle near the power lines

So the trees weren't actually in the parking lot we were in, they were across the street at the Quizno's (mmm, mmm, mmm, toasty).  But if they had fallen into the street they would have certainly been all the way over into our parking area and probably on top of my car.

I tell you, every single day there is a story out there.  All you have to do is look.  And take a picture or two!!

p.s. Right down from this location is a big intersection.  And when I turned onto this street at that intersection when headed to lunch, what did I spy with my little eye?  I will tell you what I spied. I spied one of my former doula clients out there panhandling.  I was not in a position to get turned around right then to go over there and with the fire and such, after lunch I checked and she was not there.  I will head over that direction again in the next few days and see if she is there again and talk to her.  I wish I could tell you how sad this makes me.  The little frowny emoticon just won't cut it.

Doula Stuff

I was going to come up with a catchy title and then I thought to myself, "Self, if you let them know ahead of time it is doula stuff, those who are interested will check in and read and those who don't give a fig about birthing babies will know to leave this alone and not bother and then be disappointed." So that is what I did.

Did I tell you that my Rachel Pie has moved back home?  First time in 7 years that she has been back living at home.  And it's about damn time if you ask me.  Anyhoo, she has been interested in the doula work and has taken the training twice now and was working on her doula career back in CO.  So now that she is back here, she already has the "in" so to speak on getting into the birthing community here. And she has just gone headfirst into the deep end!

So I took her on as my little apprentice/shadow doula to accompany me to all my visits and birth with my client so that she could learn the lay of the land here.  I am sure birth is like everything else and has its little regional differences in how things are done.

And Sunday was my client's day to birth her baby.  She woke up in the wee hours of the night/morning with her waters broken and light contractions.  It was a beautiful birth.  She was so calm, composed and totally willing to try anything I suggested in order to have her labor progress.  She and her husband worked well together, plus she had me and Rachel Pie there to support and help.  There was a lot of trust in that room.

Sixteen hours from the early morning awakening was the birth of a precious baby girl.  She made her entrance to the world at almost 5 p.m.  Her mama did a spectacular job of pushing and working hard and just did her best for that baby.  It was an honor to be there.

It was also a pleasure to have my Rachel Pie there to witness, to help and to learn what it is to birth a baby.  She did an amazing job and I was proud to have her there.  I hope as she grows and moves through her doula career that I will get to continue to watch her work.

I am thankful for my work.  Thankful for my clients.  Thankful for my Rachel Pie.  It was a rewarding day.

A little of this, A little of that

I have been silent for a while and I need to break that silence, but all the thoughts I have had for blog fodder are all jumbled up so I am liable to be flitting around from topic to topic.  Grab yourself some caffeine and try to keep up!

Have you read about the gay penguin couple?  Here is the latest update on them:




"After six years of lovingly building a nest together each spring, a pair of male Gentoo penguins named Inca and Rayas finally have an egg to keep in it. According to their keepers at Madrid's Faunia Park, the two are inseparable and have taken to parenting like, well, penguins to water. Inca has adopted the female role of incubating the egg, while partner Rayas watches over his buddy and the little one. Their keepers hope that the donated egg -- and the bub that hatches out of it -- will boost the pair's spirits. In past years, they apparently became rather blue during spring when surrounded by all their friends' newborns."

Awwwww.  What a sweet story.

Did you watch the DWTS finale?  I had no hopes that this season would be as good as it was.  It really was great to watch.  The final 4 were all so good that there was no reason to be disappointed no matter who won.

Speaking of finales, all the shows are having their season finales this past month and none more important to watch than Monday night's airing of the SERIES FINALE of House.  The whole series is over.  No more cranky pants House.  No more weird diseases to be discovered and cured.  No more co-workers to kill off.  It was really good and stayed true to the character of the show.  I hate it when they come up with some cutesy ending that fails miserably to resolve anything.

Oh!  I found a new favorite blog!  My absolute favorite blogger in the world is Martha Payne.

Have you heard of Martha?  No?

Well, she is a 9 year old girl who lives in Scotland.  And just the most clever thing around.  I wish I had been that smart at 9.  She was becoming disillusioned about the school lunches and she now writes a blog about it.  She posts a photo of it and rates it on taste, nutrition, how many mouthfuls she actually gets (these photos of her lunches have shocked me by how small they are) and also by whether or not she finds a hair in them.

This is an eye-opening experiment.  She asked for kids around the world to send in pictures of their own school lunches (or made at home and brought to school) to her for comparison.  And yes, her dad is helping her by tweeting about this.  And yes, Jamie Oliver is aware of this and encouraging her. He needs to get his gorgeous Naked Chef self up to Scotland and do something with their school lunches. Those meals have negligable protein, few vegetables, little or no fruit.  Mostly carbs, bread, potatoes, pasta and the like.  So go read Martha and send her some encouragement.

And on a completely different train of thought, in the paper this Sunday, right on the front page was an article titled "Despite changes, more kids are dying"

Seems that our county has taken the lead in Texas for most child deaths involving parents from abuse and/or neglect.  Lovely.  Our county has had 20 child deaths in the last fiscal year.  We also had the most confirmed cases of abused and neglected children in the state, 5,915 which is more than the 5,493 for Houston which has nearly three times as many children as our city.  More deaths with 1/3 the total number of children.  Doesn't that make your stomach turn?

The article goes on for another full page of facts, details, information, etc. And it ends with a half page listing each of the 20 children who were killed and the pertinent facts of each of their cases.  It made this very personal and real to see their little names, ages, cause of death and what criminal case or charges have been filed, that kind of outcome.  I think these little ones deserve to be honored in this way and create some awareness and hopefully get more people to step up and volunteer to help.

Do any of you remember last July when I posted this??  This little angel boy was the last one listed on this page of 20.  I had periodically checked the news online to see if anything had ever come of the father of this child admitting to hurting and ultimately killing this baby and never could find anything. So I read the little bit they had listed Sunday on this baby. And I am going to go ahead and type what is there since it is the newspaper I can assume there is no expectation of privacy.  Here's what is said:

Kaleb Alexander Janosik

Age: 22 days

Date of death: July 24, 2011

Died of head injuries.

Father admitting to striking and biting the child.

Mother and father were found "reason to believe" for physical abuse.

Justin Janosik (father) pleaded guilty to murder, received a life sentence.

My heart just breaks for all 20 of these shameful deaths.  One thing I looked at is that 11 of the 20 had previously been investigated by CPS so someone already knew there was a problem in the home.  I don't know the answer to this horrific problem but I do know that I try my hardest to make sure my work with each of my clients helps them to fall in love with their children and to know there are resources for when they are overwhelmed and feel helpless.

If you feel so moved to help with abused and neglected children, consider becoming a CASA  advocate. Or check with your CPS office and see what it takes to become a foster family for children in need.  Some of our local high schools have nurseries for the babies while moms attend school and they need volunteers there to work with the babies.  You can teach parenting classes. There are many ways you can get involved and make a difference in a child's life.  Please make the effort.  Don't just sit back and read about the tragedies being perpetrated on these young lives and do nothing. It really does take a village.

While I am on a roll (with the rants)

Dear Private Practice,

I was so excited when you were about to premiere!  Imagine!  A show about a wellness clinic that included a fertility doctor, a therapist, a midwife and an alternative medicine doctor who practiced Chinese healing and accupuncture.  What a refreshing change of pace from all the other cookie cutter shows about, well, about cutting, every chance they got.

But within the first couple of episodes I saw that you were not going to be all that you could.  And I was forced to write letters to ABC complaining about how that self-absorbed pain in the ass character of Addison Montgomery actually said the words "Midwifery?  Is that even a word?"  She belittled poor Dell, the midwife apprentice on that show and acted so superior that it made me sad.  And sick too.  But mostly, sad.

There's poor Dell on the right.  He got no respect.  Only from Naomi, who should be the second person from the left, only that person must have been replaced because that's not Naomi.  Front and center stands Addison Montgomery, and to her left is Tim Daly who we can all tell from the casual footwear is the "alternative" medicine dude.

And what happened?  Did things shape up in the mutual respect department?

Nope, not even a little bit.

You killed off Dell.

That's not exactly the way I thought you might handle the differences between care modalities.  So of course, the highly technical, interventive way has to be superior over the natural way of giving birth.

Then the last season began with Tim Daly's character leaving his herbs, his accupuncture needles, his calmer, less-invasive way of treating patients behind and all the sudden he is a

SURGEON????


wtf?

The births on this show are some of the least realistic births on television.

But last week?  Last week just took the cake.  I have resigned myself to the fact that you and I will never agree or see eye to eye on birth.

When the Addison character referred to post-partum depression or post-partum psychosis as simply "post-partum", saying something to the effect "many women experience post-partum", that was it for me.

Really?  Post-partum?  Isn't post-partum the word used to describe the period immediately following childbirth?  To demean that period in a woman's life and making it the equivalent to a psychological diagnosis is not only incorrect but inflammatory.

Shame, shame, shame on you.

I am done with you.  I am saying my good-byes now.

And good riddance.

Outraged and Sickened

I received a text yesterday that I am sure was a mass text to all the doulas in our group.  It said that one of our clients had lost her 3 week old baby to SIDS.  There was a question as to what exactly we should do to help and what to offer this poor new mama in the way of comfort.

In the seven years that I have been a doula this is the first time this issue has come up so I didn't have any ready suggestions.

After my concern over the family, my next thoughts were to the sister doula who had attended this birth and worked with the new parents through childbirth education classes and was now doing postpartum work with them.  How was she handling this loss?  What could we further do to help her through this?

Then I received a call today that rocked me to my core.

This was not a case of SIDS.  The 22 year old new dad had beaten this almost 3 week old baby to death. He admitted that he had been hitting the baby since it was born.

I am so distraught.  My insides are all twisted up and I have been crying and thinking I am going to throw up off and on all day.  There are so many questions.  How could this happen?  What was missed?

My heart just breaks thinking about this poor little defenseless child.  I don't think I can comprehend how  a situation can go so horribly wrong.  This is the kind of thing that makes me want to quit my doula work and do something like woodworking.  Something not with people.

It is just unimaginable.  Please lift this tiny little innocent babe up in your prayers.

Lots to tell!

It has been a really long week, which is why I haven't posted anything.  But here goes!  And please forgive the random way these thoughts may jump around, but that is the way my brain works.  If you and I have ever had a conversation you already know this about me and probably expect it.

First and foremost, I want to say this and get it over with.  The Casey Anthony trial just finished.  I obsessed over this damn case since it first happened.  Then there was nothing in the news.  Nothing.  I would search online for what was going on.  Who could believe it was going to take 3 whole years to get to trial?  So when I found that they were going to televise the proceedings I was all over that.  I felt like I had watched this unfold from the beginning and wanted to see it through.

How on earth the state of Florida allowed the only 12 people in this country who didn't think Casey was guilty to be on that jury is a puzzler, for sure.  Were they not seeing the same witnesses I was?  Did they not hear the same testimony?  They found her guilty of 4 counts of providing false information to law enforcement.  Why would she do that?  Was she hiding something?  Like maybe?  Oh I don't know . . .

How about the TRUTH?

The truth of what really happened to Caylee.  Who knows the truth?  Only Caylee, the murderer and God.  Unless the murderer is more than one person.  But by Casey hiding the fact that Caylee was dead for 31 days (which by the way it is ONLY 31 days because Cindy called the cops, NOT because Casey decided to ask for help finding her "missing" child.  It could have been 131 days if not for Cindy.) and then lying to the police and FBI that were now on the case looking for this missing child and leading them on a wild goose chase in all sorts of wrong directions, she sent a clear message that she didn't want them to find the truth.

Why would you do that?  What motivation was there for misleading the very people who were trying to bring your child home?

And this jury saw fit to say Casey was not guilty of 1st degree murder.  She was not guilty of aggravated child abuse.  She was not guilty of manslaughter.

She is only guilty of 4 counts of lying.  It's the motivation behind the lying that they seem to have missed.

My heart just sank when they started reading the verdicts of these charges and I realized that justice would not be served in this case.  That poor tiny child died a needless, senseless death and no one will pay for it.  I was stunned, I was sickened, and this horrible uncomfortable feeling came over me that it is too easy to get away with murder in this country.  I don't want that to be true.

So I am done, D U N, talking, obsessing, thinking about this trial.  I hope Casey never has a day's peace. And I am done.

In other news, I was at a birth this week.  Mom and Dad labored beautifully and were so in tune with each other.  I was so impressed to see him rise to this occasion.  I am never sure about how dads are going to be in birth.  Some tell me ahead of time how they see their role and we get a plan of how to best engage dad and keep him where he is comfortable and still best able to support the mom.  But this guy? He so totally exceeded my expectations.  It was fabulous to watch.  Which brings me to this, why did I have expectations?  I should have an open mind and not set these expectations or limitations for that matter of what I think will happen and how people will behave in labor.  I never want to bring any judgement to a labor.  And I hope I didn't.

We had a very low-key weekend celebrating Mr. Big Ed's belated birthday and also 4th of July.  Lots of grilling of food and just hanging out.  No fireworks around here.  Remember the drought we are having? It's still the worst on record since they started keeping such records.  It is bad.  I could care less about the stupid grass, but I do want there to be enough water to keep our trees sustained and if possible to keep the garden going.

Oh!  remember the silk solar lanterns that I got Mr. Big Ed for fathers day last year?

Here's a look at them from last year:

Well, I got him SIX MORE!!!

We have them hanging in the trees under which we have the new table and chairs.  It was magical sitting out there last night under the silk lanterns.  They have the softest light and they just float in the breeze. Lovely.

In other, other news!  You all know that Sparky and his girlfriend live here, right?  Well, she is a barista at a world-famous coffee shop that shall not be named.  And on Sunday, she found this little stray kitty had wandered up to the front of this coffee shop and was very obviously pregnant and in distress.  So she found a box to put her in and the next thing you know, she is acting as this cat's doula.  2 little babies were born in that box while she continued to talk reassuringly and stroke the new mama kitty.  Awww, it warms my heart to think about it.

She called the humane society who told her they would send someone to get them and foster them.  And you know what?

THEY NEVER SHOWED!!!

What dickheads.  And a co-worker said she would take them to her house but backed out at the last minute.  Yet another dickhead.

We could not in good conscience leave her and those babies helpless in a cardboard box on a busy street, so we are fostering all 3 of them.  We are also looking for a good cat shelter to take them.  If any of you have good advice about this, I would appreciate it.  There is no way I am keeping 3 more cats.  No. fucking. way.  I already have 2 10-year old cats who piss and shed on everything.  I have 2 5-year old cats who kill birds, squirrels, and various wildlife.  I have 2 geriatric 14-year old dogs that are not doing well.  And to top it off I have 4 year old Ernest T. Bass who wants to kill the cats and keeps trying to climb the Alpha pet ladder.  He is on the bottom rung of that ladder and is staying there, so he just needs to get over it.  So no way we are keeping these 3 precious gray stripey kitties.

But they could be yours!  I will post some pictures right away so you can see how absolutely precious they are.  That mama cat is so sweet and loving and just a joy.  And the 2 teensy little 2-day old babies?  O.M.G.!!!  Are they ever adorable.

Be on the lookout for the most awww-inspiring pictures coming soon!!

p.s. Big Brother starts in 2 days.

I am such a slacker, but my friend isn't.

I have been a really bad blogger.  I love reading all your blogs and staying current, but I have not been posting and returning the favor.  And for that I am sorry.

Life has been pretty busy over here.  I have picked up new clients and their schedules and mine weren't meshing well, so I am doing what any good doula would do and am adjusting myself and my schedule to theirs.  And for whatever reason they all want to meet at the crack of dawn.  Now, you probably know this about me already, but I am NOT a morning person.  I am whatever is the polar opposite of a morning person.  So, this is a HUGE undertaking getting me and my late-night self all synched up with the morning folks.  By 2 in the afternoon I am exhausted!  Good Lord!

Anyhoo, that is why I have not had the inspiration to post anything.

Today, I am here to tell you all about my friend Mary Helen and her NEW BOOK!  This is a sequel so you probably want to check out the original book as well.

Here is a link to her blog and her post about the book:

Let me tell you a little back story about Mary Helen and me.  We met when we were both living in the same neighborhood in Guadalajara.  We have kids that are the same ages.  We each have a boy followed by a girl and it was natural for our kids to have great play dates.  They were so cute together.  I will have to dig around and find some pictures of them to show you.  I think they had more fun at Mary Helen's house because she always painted their faces and they had great imagination play over there.

So Mary Helen is a journalist and was living in Chile during the Pinochet years and met her fabulously fun and charming British geologist husband down there.  That is where she started gathering the beginnings of her first book, Soldiers in a Narrow Land.

There were many times when Mary Helen needed to focus on her writing and research and I had the kids all over to my house so she could focus for just a few hours.  We had so many lovely times together having dinner parties, play times, and our husbands played tennis on Saturday mornings.

And who knew that many years later and many moves later, my family would end up in Chile?  We lived there just after her book came out.  The family who became our very best friends in Chile had this book on their shelves and when I commented on it, she told me that her company had made it required reading for all their employees who did business in Chile.

And just so you don't think this is just me being all biased and proud, click here to read an unbiased review of this book.

It has taken many years and lots of trips back to Chile to complete the sequel of this book.  Here is a look at the cover:

I have ordered the Kindle edition to carry with me AND I ordered the hardback to send to Mary Helen to sign for me and put on my shelf next to the other one.  

If you are interested in reading something that is not the usual light summer reading that you won't remember five minutes later, you should definitely check out these books.  If you are interested in the very recent history of one of our neighboring countries in this hemisphere, you should read these.  And if you ever want to travel in Chile, one of the most beautiful and diverse countries on the planet, I highly recommend you read these just to have some backstory about the culture and the people from the last 50 years.

And sign up to read her blog, she posts some really interesting articles not always carried by the mainstream news.

Who's been a bad blogger?

Heeeee!  When I typed "bad blogger" the first time up there in the title, it came out "baG blogger".

Bag blogger?  wtf?

I am always curious when I do things like that if they are Freudian slips or if they are just clumsy fingers.

So here's the deal, I was in a training the week before last learning to be an Infant Massage Educator. And this past week at a Doula Training.  In the middle of the classes was Easter weekend and my car's breakdown.  Been a busy time at Chez Lisa Pie, is what it has been.

Can you even flipping believe that it is May?

MAY????

Already?

You know what this means, don't you?  I am already behind making my Christmas plans.  If I am going to call myself a person who makes and handcrafts all my gifts they I need to be more on the ball with the planning and creating, don't I?

So I am asking for all ideas on things I can make for gifts.  Any ideas are welcome.  My criteria is that the gifts should be things that are welcome, consumable if possible, environmentally friendly, and it would be even better if they were meaningful for the recipient.  Oh, and it should have no parts that are stamped Made in China.  I am boycotting Made in China what with their shitty faux drugs, tainted pet food and melamine (plastic) in infant formula.  Shame on them and their no-standards-selves.

Any ideas?

Now, on to something completely different.

~~~~  The Reading of the Obits!  ~~~~


Oh, how I wish I could share some of these photos with you!  I just adore the old pics from the '40s and '50s.  Cute hair-dos and earbobs, abound!

There was an absolutely precious photo of Helen Ruth who "passed from this life into the loving arms of the Lord".

Next we come to this one: "Our Lord called Adelina to his heavenly home."

This one was really clever: "Celeste was escorted by angels to her eternal home."

I loved this one.  This man was a professional baseball player and "was known to many as the man who struck out Mickey Mantle and he was proud to let people know it with the newspaper clipping he carried in his wallet."

**How cool is that?


Ok, you will love the story told in the next obituary.  It would make a great novel or a movie.

"At the age of 14, after traveling along 19 days, on a ship from China to California, he arrived in San Antonio in 1938. He attended an American school and slo attended the Chinese school working alongside his father and brothers at Sunny Side Grocery Store. It was there that he learned his great work ethic. He eventually moved to Laredo, Texas where he managed the Shanghai Cafe and that was where he met his future wife."

**See?  Isn't that a great story?  It goes on to say that after retirement, he and his wife traveled to China, Mexico and took cruises.


Then we came to one of a man that I actually knew.  Many years ago we were in the same area and I knew of him back then.  After listing all him many civic and charitable accomplishments his family had this to say "He lived his life based on Christian principles, especially to help others in need. He exemplified honesty, integrity and a work ethic that he passed on to his children. His glass was always half full."

Best and most wonderful names belongs to the obituary of Miss Lilly Pearl who was born in Crabapple Creek.  She was married to Chester Louis and sister to Herbert.  She was an avid rose grower and a "consulting rosarian" with the San Antonio Rose Society.

**If my name were Lilly, I might have raised lillies rather than roses.


And I am sorry to do this but it has to be done.  The family that gets the You People Should Not Be Allowed to Bestow Stupid Names on Innocent Babes award includes these:

Julio Cesar

Misty

Krystal (like the burgers??)

Channce

Codie

Cash Bailey

and bringing up the rear . . .

Canyen.

This is closely followed by the Family with the Worst Nicknames:

Debbie = Booboo

John = Big Boy

Last but not least, since he was alphabetically last we come to Mr. Kenneth Wayne W. who will be dearly missed by his friends and loyal rat terrier, Clyde.

**Awwww.  No family?  Just friends and a loyal rat terrier?  How sad.  There were no services listed either.  R.I.P. Mr. Kenneth Wayne.  


I sure hope one of his friends takes Clyde and gives him a good home.

Getting political today

I have made it a point to not get political here.  I don't really want any dischord in my life or my cyber-life. But I am going to step a bit, just a big toe dipping into this political pool, so please bear with me.

I am a birth doula.  I am also a post-partum doula.  And I am a massage therapist who specializes in prenatal and infant massage.  I am also a mother.  And I hope one day to be a grandmother.  So you might tend to pigeon-hole me into the group of people who like to call themselves Pro-Life.  Who would not want to consider themselves Pro-Life?  Are we ever Anti-Life?

Groups have ways of finding innocuous-sounding names to bring in people who might never darken their doors had they really known the group's agenda.

Because of all that mentioned above, I am firmly encamped in the Pro-Choice side of this debate.  One thing that is sacred to me as a woman mentoring other women is choice.  I tell every. single. one. of my clients over and over again

If you don't know your choices, you have none.


It's true.  It is true about childbirth, about parenting, about making food choices, about budgeting, whatever. If you only know one way, that's what you do.  If you only have one viable choice, you go along.  Even if there is a niggling little feeling in the back of your heart telling you "there must be another way".

So, today I am here to say that this is absolute bullshit being put out there that funding must be cut to Planned Parenthood.  Please go check out Planned Parenthood and see just exactly what kind of work they do. There is so much need for the kind of education they provide, the testing of HIV they do, the pregnancy testing, just everything.

If the Pink Bus is coming to a city near you, please go and support them.  Go and find out.  Go and educate yourself about the need to educate.

Just don't do nothing while they get their funding slashed and the rights of women get trampled and thrown back to the 1940's.

I work with pregnant teenagers, some who have homes, some who do not.  I work with some at the juvenile detention center.  And I work with some who believe they are in a committed relationship and have the rose-colored view that everything will be the way they are picturing it in their head as opposed to reality.  The numbers of my actual clients who end up staying together with their boyfriend, keeping their babies, and living as a family unit are dismal.  This never happens.  It does not matter what the ecomonic level of the family is, this is such a ridiculously hard way to start out, that most of these girls can not find their way through it with this dream intact.

What they need is more support from the community.  From people like me who have lists and lists of organizations, agencies and such that can provide education, support groups for the young moms and dads, access to birth control so that they can cope with what they have before adding to it.

What they don't need is to be treated like children who have done wrong and now have to be punished. "You made this bed, now you have to lie in it".  Really?  That's how you want them to approach parenting?  As a consequence of being bad?  How does that translate to their feelings about this baby?  Are you able to love a baby that is a daily reminder of your transgressions and your failings?

It's a thorny issue this one.  I just thought I would go ahead and let you know my stance on this.  I will be standing outside my closest Planned Parenthood clinic tonight from 6 to 8 p.m. in solidarity with others.

Please do some research and arm yourself with facts.  If you don't know your choices, you have none.

More Randomness coming at ya! You may want to duck.

Yes, Indeedy.  Randomness.  That is today's theme.

1. As you know by now, I am a birth doula.  I have a client who has been due now for several days and normally, I am on "High Orange Alert" 2 weeks before and until the birth.  But for some reason my High Orange Alert slid off the radar on July 4th.  I slept late that morning and then stayed up really late, because that is what happens when you don't get out of bed!  Anyhoo, I was up really late and was just getting myself ready for bed when (you know what happens here, don't you?) I got the call.  Yep, labor had started and we were all going to meet up at the hospital.  So, I went to the birth at 2 a.m. and got home at 10 p.m. If you are like me you can see that that is darn close to 24 hours after having been awake for about 15 hours before that.  And if you are still more like me than you would care to think, you will know that I was like the walking dead by the end.  Not real perky is what I would say.

But the baby is here.  He is so wanted and loved by his parents and all the extended family.  I am really happy for them.  And if I tell you that I am truly blessed to get to do this work, you will probably say "We know.  We hear that crap from you all the time.  Give it a rest, already."  But it is true.  Sometimes I am ashamed to take money for doing such rewarding work.

Happy Birthday on July 5, little one!!  It was a blessing to be there and help your parents get you here.

2. Obits - I haven't posted anything about the obit reading lately.  One thing that has been really weird about reading all the local obituaries is that in the last couple of months we have had 3 deaths from right here in my neighborhood.  Not only in the neighborhood, but on the next street over, to be more specific. That's a little spooky.  Makes me want to get busy exercising and getting into better shape.  I think I would be much better off to start the second half of my life in the best shape I can get into, don't you?

There was another Ignatz the other day listed as a survivor on one of the obits.  Now, I have gone my whole life and never heard the given name of Ignatz, and in the last six months BAM!!  they are all over the obits.  The Ignatz' of the world are losing their kinfolk, is what I am saying.  Kind of strange.

3. Big Brother.  It is that time again.  The time when my t.v. set is tuned to Big Brother 3 times a week, and for 3 hours late at night every night for the Big Brother After Dark stuff on showtime.  It's Big Brother, people!!  The best crap out there!  It's a genius idea, just take random idiots and stick them in a house and watch what unfolds.  No paid actors, no scripting, just watch these idiots do what comes naturally.  As we have all seen over the years, they can start out being fake, trying out a different persona, but not for long.  It's too hard over the course of 3 months (give or take) to not be yourself.  There are no allowed distractions other than a chess set and a pool table.  No music.  No singing. No t.v. No books other than the occasional Bible. No magazines. No computer.  Nothing to do but think and deal with the other random idiots stuck in the house with you.  Oh!  And you know what?  The one thing that strikes me as hilarious is that there is no built-in ice maker in the fridge.  They have to fill up ice trays and you know what that leads to?  Arguments about who made ice last, who used the ice and didn't refill the trays, etc.  No dishwasher either.  And I am constantly amazed at how none of these morons can cook!  They can't cook.  Big Brother provides them with most of the raw ingredients, vegetables, fruit, meat, fish, etc.  And they come up with the easiest things possible because they don't know what to do.  Idiots.  I want to scream at the t.v. "You have NOTHING ELSE TO DO!!  Why not cook?  Why not experiment on how to put a few ingredients together?  Create a "family" type dinner?"  But no, you normally see 12 people in there each doing their own thing and being as wasteful as possible.  Not once in all these years, not once! have any of them considered chopping up the veggies and the leftover meat and making a pot of soup.  Soup is the easiest and frankly, one of the best things to do for a big group.

I guess that is what makes for good t.v. viewing, watching those maroons and feeling superior!  Set your dvrs for Thursday night to meet the new hamsters, I mean, houseguests.  And get ready for some fun!

4. The garden.  We have been having the best tomatoes lately!  Mr. Big Ed planted a bunch of different heirloom varities and we have been plucking tomatoes left and right.  Delicious, is what they are!!

5. I promised Gladys I would take some pics of my antique breakfast room set and I swear I will do that. I pulled something in my back last week and I couldn't stand up straight for several days.   You don't want to see any pics from that position, now do you?

Have a great week out there!  And let me hear from you.  It gets pretty depressing on days when I get no comments.  Cheer me up, folks!  Leave a message.

5.

Rambling thoughts, yet again

I can NOT believe it has been six days since I posted something.  Where has the time gone?  Well, mostly it has gone to getting up at the crack of dawn to watch the early a.m. World Cup matches.  Woot!!

Are any of you watching?  Are any of you annoyed and irritated beyond belief at the flipping vuvuzelas?  Those horrendous horns that are like a big long kazoo and when you have 50,000 of them going all at the same time for 2 hours straight, it doesn't get annoying at all. And when you watch 3 matches in one day, that doesn't make it any better.  And you know what?

There's an app for that!!!  Yes indeedy, there are apps out there that can put that oh-so-annoying sound right on your phone.  Just in case you want to create axe-murderers out of your family members who have to listen to it.  Guess who got not one but TWO different vuvuzela apps on her phone?  Yep, it was me!!! Annoying my family and loved ones since heaven knows when!!

I also attended a birth this weekend.  Mom and Dad both did such a beautiful job getting that baby born.  And what a large, healthy and precious baby boy!  He was born exactly one month after his cousin.  I was at her birth as well.  Isn't it nice when sisters have their babies close and then the cousins can grow up together?  I wouldn't trade my relationships with my cousins for anything!  Extended family is a beautiful thing.  I dated a guy in high school whose parents were both the only child.  That meant no aunts, no uncles, no cousins to play with or fight with or anything.  By the time I knew this family there was only one grandma.  Such a difference from my huge, rowdy, loud family.

My car is off getting it's 5,000 mile check up and new tires, new brakes, spark plugs, the whole nine yards. It feels really funny to know that I am going to stay home, nowhere to go, and no way to get there.  Of course, I could always walk to the corner and hop on the bus if I had to, but being car-less it's a different feeling.  One we might all need to be getting used to.

Which leads me to the BP oil disaster.  I am refusing to call this a "spill" or a "leak".  This is a disaster of epic proportions and it is ON-GOING, people!  Thick, gunky crude petroleum is spewing out of the earth at rates no one seems to be able to quantify with any accuracy.  And how can I be all outraged and upset if I am still using a gas powered vehicle?  This a real pickle we have gotten ourselves into, being all dependent on oil and mostly foreign oil and no easy solutions.  But hard changes are coming and the sooner we face them, the better off we will all be.

What are the options for Americans?  We have built this infrastructure over the last 60 years of highways, and being completely dependent on them for not only getting ourselves from point A to point B on a daily basis, but also hauling all our food, store goods, everything.  Our train system is a joke.  Traveling by bus within the city is one thing, but to use the bus or trains rather than our own cars is a HUGE pain in the ass to figure out and ridiculously expensive.  Four years ago in Jan. of 2007 I joined The Compact in an effort to learn to quit buying new.  And over the last few years I have learned so much and implemented so many changes to my life all due to the Compact.  There are currently between 10,000 and 11,000 people all over the globe on the Compact list and everyone shares their little bit and we all benefit.  Changes that I have made over the course of my time on the Compact include:

* No more paper napkins, paper plates, plastic cups, disposable anything (except paper towels and tp)
I already own a ton of cloth napkins.  Now we use them on a daily basis and it has added almost nothing to my laundry.

* I make all my own cleaners and laundry soap and dishwasher soap.
Making your own cleaners is a great way to get chemicals out of your house.  If you have any sensitivities to chemicals, you need to do it anyway and you just won't believe how easy peasy it is to do this.  Not to mention the side benefit of costing waaaaaaaaayy less!  Win, win on this one.

* Revived my composting ways.  I have composted off and on for years, but forced myself to get serious about it.  And let me just say this, if you take everything that can be composted out of your garbage and then you take all your recyclables out, there is just not very much garbage left.  Which leads to . . .

*Changed my shopping habits.  If there are two products available and one has lots more packaging and plastic, start buying the other one.  Make it a priority to purchase things with less packaging.  Don't bring it in your house and then you won't have to deal with it.

*Changed my shopping habits, part 2.  I am really strict about taking my own shopping bags with me. No more plastic bags coming in the house!  If you don't think plastic is a problem, watch this and this.

*Changed my shopping habits, part 3.  I try really, really hard to buy as many local and organic products that I can.  Yes, they cost more.  Yes, it can be tricky trying to find them.  Yes, it is necessary and it is worth it.

We all need to do more.  Whatever we are doing to be good stewards of the earth, we need to do more.  We don't need more.  And one of the most important things I have learned over the last 3 1/2 years is this: There is no *away*.  When you throw something *away*, you are just giving that problem to someone else.

And on that happy note, I will leave you with my favorite recipe for all-purpose cleaning.  I mix this up and pour it in a spray bottle.  This lasts about 2 to 3 weeks or so.

3 Tbsp. vinegar
1/2 tsp washing soda
1/2 tsp vegetable oil based liquid soap (Castile type soap like Dr. Bronners or Murphy's oil soap)
2 cups hot water

Mix in a spray bottle and use as you would 409 or any other non-rinse cleaner.  Note:  I use the tea tree oil version of Dr. Bronners and I also add in about 10 drops of real tea tree oil for extra disinfecting.

If you were to do a cost-analysis of this vs. whatever product you are currently using, I think you might be pleasantly surprised.  Let me know if you do try it.  And also if there are any other cleanser recipes you need, just give me a holler!

The Taxman Cometh and sundry thoughts

It's that day again.  Why, oh why, are we surprised every year when this deadline rolls around?  We know it is coming.  We see it happen each and every year.  Silly procrastinators.

This is not me that I was referring to.  I am related (by blood and marriage) to a great many procrastinators who would never finish anything if it weren't for the last minute deadline.  Not me, it makes me nervous, anxious and extremely agitated for things to be put off to the last flipping second.  And yet, everyone around me does this.  It's like they thrive on the tension of "will I make it or won't I?"  Nope, not for me.  Get it done and get it over with.  That way you can relax and do the things you want to do.

Right now on my desk are all my papers and forms for my DONA recertification.  I have been working on this for the last 2 or 3 weeks.  Guess when it is due?  Would it be today?  NO WAY!  That would make me Mr. Big Ed.  No, this is due in July.  But it is a process.  And it takes time.  So I am trying my best to methodically get through it all and have it ready to go in plenty of time.  I want the recertification people to have all the time they need to wade through it and not put my licensing in jeopardy quibbling over getting my paperwork in just in the nick of time.  Let's face it, I am an anal-retentive dork.

I noticed that since I posted about the little returned Russian boy, no one has come back to my little pink blog.  I waded in where I shouldn't have, I guess.  I certainly hope I stepped on no toes or offended anyone.  That was certainly not my intention.  But unintentional offenses are still offenses in my book.  So please accept my apologies if you were offended and you are still around to receive these apologies.

I went out to one of the local universities last night for part of a literary event they were holding.  Two of my favorite authors were there.  One was introducing the other.  It was really wonderful.  Her remarks were really for the students who are wanting to pursue writing.  I was going to say "writing as a career" but that is wrong.  How many writers pursue writing as a career?  John Grisham, Nicholas Sparks, Danielle Steele.  But really good writers who have a need, a longing, a desire so strong they can't ignore it, those writers might be offended by the phrase "writing as a career".  So anyway, she was addressing these students who have a passion to write (better, yes?).   Even I got something out of it.  Aside from a bit of hero worship by getting to sit at her feet and listen to her read her work and then talk about how she came to this particular idea and answer questions about what happened to characters.

And what I know is that she would have never apologized for offending readers.  She would want you to be offended and sit in that feeling and figure out why you were offended, what bothered you about what you read, and to then get mad and translate that to your own life.

There is nothing like a feisty, strong-minded Southern woman, is there?

No News Day

Today was supposed to be the day where I tell you all about the fabulous birth I attended.  This is my client who is a repeat client.  I was with her and her husband for the birth of their second daughter two years ago. And they were kind enough to want me to be there this time around.  However.

You knew there would be a however, didn't you?  She hasn't had the baby yet!  Thursday was the official "we could really be off by 2 weeks either way" due date and since the big Full Wolf Moon was last night and since we have had a huge cold blue norther' blow in with really cold wind and freezing rain you would think it would be last night, right?  But no.

I am not complaining in the least.  I want that baby to come when that baby is good and ready and not one minute before.  But, here is something I don't think my clients understand, I get so amped up and excited and anxious FOR them that it is hard to just relax.  I do my very best to not show this to them, and just be as calm and collected as I can.  But as a doula, it is damn near impossible to NOT be invested in their birth and want all the best for them.  And even want them to birth on the day they really hope it will be.  Does that make sense?

As a mom you always have a sense of when the baby will come and what days may be auspicious for you and your family.  Even so, we all know that the baby is in charge of birth.  When the baby is all done and ready for the outside world, he/she sends a hormone signal to mom's brain which kickstarts the contractions to get things rolling.  But I do believe that moms have an intuition, if you will, about when their little ones will appear.  So I am hoping that this mom is not disappointed that it didn't happen for her on that particular day.

I just got off the phone with her.  So if you are reading this, please do send some beautiful birthing prayers, vibes, good intentions her way.  My hope for her (and for all birthing moms) is that it be a peaceful, empowering, and awe-inspiring experience.

Doula Training complete

The fall Doula Training was held this past Thursday, Friday, Sat. and Sunday (today) till noon. We had 18 participants and loads of local Doulas facilitating, helping, cooking, and just being as useful as possible. Our local group of Doulas is such a wonderful source of love, support, information, help and nurturing that it is unbelievable. This is not only for our clients, but for each other. We truly do nurture, lift up, and empower all the women in our lives. It is such a blessing to be associated with all these women.

I think one of the main reasons why this is such a cohesive group is because of our founder and director. The tone of a group is always set by its head, don't you think? She has been quietly and tirelessly working to build this group for more than 10 years and thousands of families have been served in that time. She never misses an opportunity to encourage each and every one of us and to tell us how much she cares about us.

Many of the 18 participants and now prospective-Doulas live in other areas and won't be joining our group. I really hope that they will find something similar in their hometowns to help them on their journey of serving women. For the others that are here locally, I will be looking forward to seeing them at upcoming meetings, in the office and assisting at the next training that has already been scheduled for April, 2010.

Being a Doula is truly a labor of love and I am so glad I found my way to this path at this particular stage of my life. I can't imagine anything I would rather be doing. Isn't it amazing when you find a calling and then find a way to be compensated for doing what you would do for free? It just makes it that much more satisfying and rewarding to know that your services are of value.

What things do you do or what things would you do if you could do anything you want without regard of the money? It's sad that we get stuck in a rut of spending 60 - 80 hours a week doing something we hate, in a place we hate, and away from our families just so we can pay the bills. There isn't much time left for doing things that nourish your soul, is there?

Recently I was thinking that if we were growing as much of our food as we could with the small piece of land that we have available to us, we could cut way back on working outside the home. Work just enough to pay for the electricity and utilities that we need. What else do we need? We all have way too much "stuff" so we don't need to keep buying more, do we? Food and utilities made the top of my list of consumables. Most everything else is not really a necessity, but rather a desire or a luxury.

Anyhoo, I think since I have found something I love doing that fills me up emotionally, and spiritually, but not necessarily financially. What I am doing now is finding ways to make the financial *needs* match the income rather than the other way round. Does that make sense? It makes sense to me in my head, I am just never sure that I express myself clearly outside my head!!

I hope you are doing good works that help you to be fulfilled and if you aren't able to do that right now I hope that you have other things that make up the difference for you.

Christmas Presents

Okay, if you are on my Christmas list and DON'T want to know what you might be getting, turn away. Close this screen and don't peek. If you are not on my list and want to know what I am doing so as to give you some inspiration, please read ahead. If you think it is too early to think about Christmas and gifts, well you are just wrong!

So, Christmas gifting is a year-long process for me. I work and plan all year long as to what I am going to be doing and who gets what. For the last 5 or 6 years I have tried to switch to mostly all handmade gifts rather than store-bought. I am trying to get the focus back on the intention behind the holiday and the reason for gifting rather than supporting Best Buy and Target. I had frankly gotten fed up with gifting "gift cards" and can I tell you how many of the damn things go lost in my house? And I am sure mine is not the only house they go missing in. I think buying gift cards is like tossing money into a black hole.

A couple of years ago I started planting loofahs. And that year everyone on my list got their own personal loofah to scrub with, a crocheted cotton wash cloth, jars of bath salts and a bar of homemade soap. These were all gifted in a crocheted shopping bag. No waste involved here at all, no paper, no tape, everything was usable.

Before that I made flavored vinegars and olive oils. Those were really good and easy to do. The trick was finding beautiful bottles with corks to package them in. We made some pickled mixed vegetables from the garden back when we weren't living in a drought and actually HAD a garden to pick things from!!

This year I am making the cutest aprons you have ever seen. They are just precious! I am really excited about them. But not as excited as I am about this . . . . . .

For 2 almost 3 years I have been working on a cookbook as a fundraiser for San Antonio Birth Doulas http://www.sabirthdoulas.org/index.html This is a non-profit organization I work with and it is very dear to my heart. Finally, after all this time the cookbook has gone to print! Hooray!!! So I will be gifting most of the people on my list a cookbook and a new apron. I am really excited about this. Now I just have to come up with a clever way to present them.

The cookbook is very family and baby friendly. The chapters are not the usual Appetizers through Desserts. Instead we have more than 400 recipes that are categoriezed in Breakfast, Lunch, Dinner, Arts & Crafts, Lunch Box & Snacks, Parties & Celebrations, Pregnancy Post-partum & Baby. All the recipes are tried and true and sent in by people who work with SABD and their family members. I am really proud of it.

If you are interested in purchasing one of these cookbooks (all the proceeds go straight to the works we do), please let me know. I would be happy to mail some out to you so that you can gift a few of these yourself.

Oh, and if you know someone who is having a baby I have printed up a new batch of the baby food cookbook I started back when my kids were small. I worked on it and refined it over the years and it is really nice. Same thing with this one, I am donating all proceeds after my printing costs back to SABD. So you can feel good about making these purchases knowing you are not only gifting a high quality book that will be used to nourish your loved ones, but you are helping us to help under-privileged women and babies. Talk about your win-win situation!

Important Video

http://vimeo.com/6182741

Please watch this short video. It is so important that this information be available to everyone. There is a link to share this with your legislators and also one to donate if you wish to help.

Thanks!

Back to Tara

Feeling very Scarlet O'Hara today. Fiddle-de-dee and all that stuff. Not the least bit interested in things that require actual deep thinking. Like complete sentences. Not making any of THOSE today either!

I attended a birth last Friday. It was fab-u-liscious!! I loved this couple and the way they worked together for their goal of a beautiful natural birth with no drugs. None for them, none for me, and especially none for that baby. And oh! What a handsome, alert, vocal and LARGE baby he is! I was so proud and honored to be there and witness his arrival into the world.

My Rachel Pie is leaving again. She is traveling and then heading back to school for her final semester. Woo Hoo!!! Then come the big decisions, staying for graduate school, working, working and going to school together, coming home and working or going to school or both, or whatever is behind Door #3. All these possibilities and only one life to live. What to do, what to do. Personally, I am of 2 minds on this and my opinion doesn't really count so I will tell you what they are.

1. She should come home and go to school here and live rent free.
2. She should spread her wings and go further afield and see what else is out there before she gets to the age of settling down and never gets to do that.

See, 2 sides of the coin. The practical, let's save some $$ side and the not-practical go where the wind takes us side.

On the other side, Sparky has decided to move back home and go to school full time to pursue his degree. Maybe that whole "nature abhorrs a vacuum thing" is what's happening? Rachel Pie is about done with school so it's Sparky's turn to be studious.

My first thoughts and wishes for both of them are that they are happy, healthy and doing what they love. But then I watch Suze Orman and all I want them to do is SAVE EVERY FREAKING PENNY THEY COME ACROSS!! There will be no social security to care for them when they are old and they better start putting aside for that rainy day now. How scary is that? We would love to make it so that they don't have to consider these things but since we are not Rockefellers or Vanderbilts, that is the way of the world.

My new motto is "Instead of trying to have more and more things make you happy, try to enjoy the freedom of being happy with less." Surely, someone has said that more eloquently than I.

Here's to a summer of the revolving front door! One in, the other one out. Someday, hopefully, good Lord willing and the creek don't rise, BOTH of them will be home again at the same time. :)

I love being a Birth Doula

I just had to get away from the recent negative and sad posts, and what better way than to talk about births! I really do love being a birth doula. It is honestly the most rewarding thing I have ever done. Not monetarily, that's not what I am talking about.

I can't even imagine doing anything that is more awe-inspiring than witnessing a woman go through the process of bring life into the world and creating a family. I really try to be of service and hope that my contribution makes that transition a bit easier.

One of my clients from last year and I had lunch with her most awesome and precious little boy today. And I have started the "busy season" with lots of pre-natals and impending births. Two July babies, 2 August and 2 Septembers coming right up. Woo Hoo!!

Off to go meet with a client right now as a matter of fact. ; )

Doula stuff, etc.

I got a new doula client last week who is due this week! I really like her and feel we have a good rapport and it has been a while since I have been at a birth so it seems like we were meant to be.

After that I have a July birth scheduled, then August and Sept. Out of all 4 of these births only one is a girl, 2 boys and 1 not known yet. I always make a soft cotton blanket for my babies, so I will need to get cracking on some more boy blankies.

Last week we had visitors from Denver here and the wife of the bunch does childbirth ed classes and is now doing some doula work for her local hospital. Their hospital keeps a rotation of doulas on call so that if anyone comes in and asks for one, they get a call. I like that idea. Nothing like that around here. But you get no prenatal contact with the moms to get to know them and build a trusting relationship, so it makes me think the doula's services will be limited. I don't know, maybe there is some research out there that would be worth looking at. Most importantly, I think having a doula in ANY capacity is better than not having one.

Tomorrow is my sister's birthday. We are exactly 16 months apart. I wish her a beautiful day with no stress and lots of hugs and other expressions of love and appreciation.

Yesterday it was in the high 80's around here and with bright, blazing sun. Today it is 40-50 and breezy and cloudy. Certainly interesting weather.

So yesterday was Palm Sunday and we are now in Holy Week leading up to Easter Sunday. Last year we had a very non-traditional paella for Easter and enjoyed it so much I believe we are doing it again this year! Nothing like making new traditions! We have also made enchiladas, rice, beans and guacamole our traditional Christmas Dinner. After tamales for Christmas Eve, it just seemed like the right thing to do! We are real sticklers about Thanksgiving, though. No one messes with the turkey dinner, I don't care who you are! :)

My Doula work

It surprised me when I realized I have not written anything about my being a birth doula. It is hard to even call it "work", it is more of a calling. Being a birth doula and doing my best and giving all I can for each of my clients is the most rewarding thing I have ever been paid to do. Funny how the best jobs are the ones that don't pay in $$ but in satisfaction.

I have been doing doula work for a long time but only in the last 4 years have I done the training and the hard work to get certified to perform my doula duties. (Gotta love that little turn of phrase! Doula Duties) Since then I have worked with dozens of moms and their babies. I remember each of them and hope that my memories of them don't fade too much with time.

One thing that strikes me is how on occasion I feel a huge "growth spurt" rather than a soft, gradual learning with each birth. Does that make sense? I have learned so much each and every labor. No one tells you that. No one explains how much you will gain by being there and witnessing each woman's struggle and strength to birth her child. Women are amazing. And it would really be nice if more of them would just trust themselves to instinctively birth the way their bodies were meant to. And it would be even nicer if they were given the support to do this from their birthing team, be they doctors, midwives, nurses, husbands, mothers, best friends or whoever. There are loads of well-meaning people in attendance who unknowingly undermine mom's intentions. I find that really sad when it happens and you can just see the mom's confidence disappear. Doesn't set her up for a successful beginning as a mother, does it?

Before this starts sounding all maudlin, what I want to do is list some things I have learned by being a doula.

1. I say this to each of my clients " If you don't know your choices/options, you have none"
Educated yourself!
2. A light touch is worth more than 100 words.
3. Women are amazing and stronger than they know.
4. I love men who cry at their child's birth.
5. The more I learn, the more I know about how much MORE I have to learn!
6. Having the right energy in the room lessens the pain and the fear, conversely a little of the wrong energy will just suck the confidence right out.
7. I love midwives and their dedication to their clients.
8. The range of care by ob/gyns is huge! Talk to your doctor and make sure you are both on the same page regarding the care you want and don't want.
9. Never assume anything. Make a birth plan but use it as an instructional, flexible guideline. Nothing is set in stone.
10. I say this to all my clients, too. Never in the course of all time has there ever been you, the mom-to-be and this baby about to be born, ever. We can make lots of plans and hypothesize about how the birth will go, but since you are unique we will go with the labor that nature gives us. Be flexible. Flexibility is the key to being a good parent, so let's start now.
11. The absolute best thing you can do for your child is to breastfeed. No question. There is too much evidence about the immediate and long-term benefits to both mom and baby for you not to work at it.

Eleven is a good number to stop at. I feel better having addressed this lack of posting. And I just want to say I love my clients. Each and every one of them.