Starbuck's Simpsons encounter

So I go into my local Starbuck's as you do and ordered by Veinte sized Iced Passion Tea non-sweet.  The perfect drink to keep you hydrated on these hot horrible droughty days.

The barista grabs my cup, asks my name and starts to write.  When I answered Lisa, she started singing this song.

I loved this episode of the Simpsons so much!  The barista and I both laughed and she went on singing and I left her a bigger tip.  : )

I'm back and flitting from topic to topic. Do try to keep up!

Hey, it has been a while.  I was on a pretty impromptu roadtrip with my sister so that was fun.  We sang along with Adele and the Backstreet Boys, because that is how we roll.  Ha!

So, today is 100 years since the Titanic sank and in honor of that the History Channel is showing a fabulous memorial tonight with lots of never before seen due to new technology just now finding it kind of stuff.  For those of us that are obsessed with Titanic and all the horrific sadness, this is a goldmine.  Be sure to set your dvr or tivo to record this bit of history.

Also, in t.v. update news!  Are y'all watching anything right now?  Let me tell you what all is on my dvr.

The Borgias - Showtime channel, fabulous series about the infamous family that ran the Vatican and Rome.  And you have to know anytime you can have Jeremy Irons playing someone evil it is gonna be good.

The Big C - Also on Showtime.  I think this is the 3rd season of this wonderful, thoughtful series starring Laura Linney and Oliver Platt.

Nurse Jackie - Showtime, yet again.  Showtime has some great series.  If you don't get this channel, why the hell not?

Game of Thrones - HBO - o.m.g.!!!  Watch it.

Eastbound and Down - HBO, Kenny Powers with a mullet!

Top Shot - History Channel, Colby Donaldson, cool guns, nice looking men, really cool blowing up of stuff, and Colby Donaldson, enough said.

Modern Family - ABC, Best. Flipping. Show. Ever.

Survivor - CBS.  What is more fun than watching idiots trust the wrong people and disaster ensues?

Amazing Race - CBS.  See above comment about Survivor.

Real Time with Bill Maher - HBO, I can not go more than a week without seeing his New Rules at the end of the show.  Awesome.

Jeopardy! - CBS.  Love Jeopardy!  and I also love yelling "Can it, Trebek!  or Suck it, Trebek! or It's HUN-DRED you morons, NOT HUNNERD!"  They may be able to pass the Jeopardy online quiz but they still can't pronounce hundred.  Idiots.

I can't think of what else my dvr records for me.  Sparky also has his shows recording, like Aqua Teen Hungerforce, Family Guy, Metalocolypse.  When they are on we don't miss It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia and The League.  Those are both on FX.

Oh!  Also we watch (although this will be the final season coming up) Breaking Bad on AMC.

Quick!  Changing subjects.

Someone, I don't know who, recommended the Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy to me.  Whoever it was, obviously doesn't know me.  I barely made it through book one.

It is such trite crap I could NOT believe it got greenlighted, or green lit or was given the thumbs up. Holy Moly, is it bad!

Please don't be taken in by the hype or the fact that book one has already been optioned for a movie. I can not even imagine how they will make this be not a boring, repetitive piece of porno trash.

There are not enough descriptive words to tell you how much I hated all the characters.  The female lead was so fucking annoying and stupid I couldn't even believe it.  The male lead?  Warped, controlling, and so strange it defied all logic that she would be soooo attracted to him that all her common sense would go right out the window.

What I'm saying is unless you are looking for s&m bondage porn laced with the worst and most repetitive dialogue, you don't want to bother with this piece of crap.

Did you try the brown rice crusted quiche recipe yet?  Please do.  I am sure you will like it.

What else has been going on around here that I wanted to talk about?

Oh!  I know what I have been trying to remember to tell you about!

Have you seen this ad?

I was watching this and thought to myself, "Self, if they took a whole shirt and made a dickie out of the top part, this is what is left over."

IT'S A DICKIE FOR YOUR ASS!

Where do they come up with this stuff?  And why, oh why, are we gullible enough to buy it?

Trendy Top, indeed.

Have a great day and I will be here to discuss some more ancestry.com findings in the next few days!

Hilarious Ad

You know how last week I ranted and bitched about a few ads that I hate?

Here's one I think is just too damn funny!

Bahahaha!!

yet another post about Christmas songs

I know, I know, you have heard all you want about Christmas music in addition to actually HEARING the flipping songs all day long.  But in the interest of full disclosure, I wanted to share a couple more thoughts about this topic.

I make a huge production of finding just the right song to be ringtones for all the people on my cel phone. Then I make another production of getting a separate default ringtone and finally!  one more prodcution for the Caller Tune that you get to listen to while you are waiting for me to answer my damn phone.  Not long after Halloween my Caller Tune gets switched to a Christmas song, because why not!

So I went through the list of songs available and I now have the cheesiest songs available for my ring tone and also for the Caller Tune.  (Why on earth am I capitalizing Caller Tune? Is there a trademark thing?)

Which songs did I choose?  Well, you could call me to find out one of them.  Or you could be in the room with me when someone else calls to hear the other.  But the fastest way would be for me to just get on with it and TELL YOU!

Caller Tune that you get to listen to when you call me is:


All I Want for Christmas Is You by Mariah Carey - now the ONLY reason I have this one is because of the movie Love, Actually.  I adore that movie and really love when that little girl is singing this song.  I like this even more than I dislike Mariah Carey, so that's something.

And drum roll . . . . . . . . .

The cheesey song I get to hear when you call me is . . . . . .


Last Christmas by Wham!

Hilarious, is what that is!  What on earth could be funnier than George Michael singing Christmas carols?

It's a gorgeous day out there, get out and enjoy it.  Finish up your holiday preparations, whether it be card writing, present shopping, gift wrapping and shipping or planning your menu.  And sing some Christmas carols while you are doing your thing.

Christmas

Last year about this time I posted a rant about the Christmas songs I just can't abide.  You can see that here if you are interested.  I just re-read it and I still firmly believe that those Top 3 songs are an abomination. Horrible crap that never should have been recorded.

So this year, I would like to focus on the really good and fabulous Christmas songs and carols.  Just as a quick little review, Christmas songs are new-ish, they are about Santa, snowmen, bells and buying crap.  Christmas carols are about baby Jesus, stars, Virgin Mary, faith and are usually found in a hymnal.  I am not saying all Christmas songs are bad and all Christmas carols are good.  There is good and bad in all these things.  There are also plenty of songs that are not recorded to celebrate anything other than the record label's ability to separate us from our folding money.

To me, the good songs are the ones that make you feel something.  Joy, love, anticipation or just plain happiness that you can remember all the verses!

And again, in no particular order, here are some of my favorite Carols/Songs.

O Come All Ye Faithful - this has always been one of my favorites.  It really makes you want to stand tall, sing out loud and feel how your soul soars.  Awesome, in every sense of the word.

Away in a Manger - One of the first carols everyone learns.

The First Noel - when you get to the "Born is the King of Is-rael!" part, you can't help but tear up, can you?

The Twelve Days of Christmas - I love this song!  My favorite version is with John Denver and the Muppets.  Such a happy song.

Silent Night - This is the traditional song to end all Christmas Eve church services with all the lights out and everyone with lit candles.  It doesn't get any more reverent than this.

Holly Jolly Christmas - It does not feel like Christmas till Burl Ives sings this one.

I'll Be Home for Christmas - When I lived in Chile our American Women's group would have a huge Christmas luncheon with silent auctions, quilt raffles and all sorts of festive things.  After we ate we would all sing Christmas carols and then finish by standing  in a huge circle holding hands and singing this song.  Never a dry eye by the end.  It was so emotional for many of the long-time residents who never got back home for Christmas.  Then of course, we would walk out into the Chilean summer sunshine and get knocked back into reality.

But for a few hours, we were all cozy wearing our Christmas finery and dreaming of cold snowy holidays.

I listen to Christmas music darn near all year long.  Actually, my home phone ringer is "We Wish you a Merry Christmas" so yeah, I do hear Christmas music all year long!

There are so many good ones to pick from that I could be here listing them all day.  And that makes it all the more ridiculous that they have to play those horrendous Top 3 Songs That Never Need to be Played Again.  Hummmppphh.

What are your favorites?  Do you have any that you despise?  Are they different than mine?

Lemme hear from you!

Ranting about songs, in general, not just annoying Christmas songs

I wasn't going to start out the new year with a rant.  But then I thought why not?  Why not get it over with and out of the way?  And since I was just recently complaining about the horrible Christmas songs that never need to be played again.  Ever.  I further thought I would go ahead a rant a bit more about other songs I just don't like.  And people?  There are a TON, a shitload even, of crappy songs out there!

No, don't worry, I will not try to list ALL the really bad songs.  Just a few of the worst and then I will graciously let you have the floor to throw in your really bad songs, just in case you happen to have a few that didn't make my list.  Last year I was reading this great blog called Test Pattern which is now shut down, but anyhoo the reason I bring it up is that she did a post about what she called "The Rod Stewart Rule".  Apparently, there is a well-known, but little-talked-about rule in which you can have 3 songs/singer/musical groups that you hate and anytime you are around you have complete authority to change the music.  So if you are riding around in the car with your friend and in said friend's car, and a song/singer/musical group comes on that is on your list, you have grounds for changing the station and it's all okay and legal and such.  Did the rest of you know about this rule?  I thought it was hysterical that she called it the Rod Stewart Rule!  You know where he ranked on her list.  : )

I am reaching waaaaaaaay back in the past for a few of these gems, so here goes!

Horrible Bad Songs that should Go Away

1. I'm the happiest girl in the whole U.S.A.  (AAAAARRRGGHH, Kill me now! Luckily, you can go years without ever having to hear this atrocious thing again?

2. Swingin' - I have NO idea what this song is about or why anyone let this moron record this crap.

3. Leo Sayer - remember this twit from the late 70's?  Wish you could forget him?

4. Janet Jackson - I know I am going to get flack for this one.  But really, who can even hear or understand any of her lyrics?  She is beautiful.  She is a helluva dancer.  But I can't hear her! She always seems to be whispering and on top of that I can't understand half of what she sings.  Belt it out, sister!

5. Prince and the Artist formerly known as Prince - whatever you are calling yourself, I am not impressed.  Sorry, but he is a nut  and and over-rated nut at that.  His father used to shop at the Walgreen's where my RachelPie worked during high school.  Nut doesn't fall far from the tree, is what I am saying.

6. Scar Tissue by the RHCP - Can anyone understand any of these lyrics?  I have NO IDEA what half the words are.  I like the Chile Peppers, I really do.  Even though all their songs sound the same now.  Is every song since Californication a new version of that same song?

There are plenty of really bad songs out there.  And there are probably songs that I hate way worse than these, but I am luckily having amnesia regarding them because otherwise they would be stuck in my head and I would have to sing them for days.  So, do your best.  Throw some bad songs at me and let's what other people hate!