Christmas Rant

Here I am ranting again. Believe it or don't. Who could be such a Scrooge McGrinch as to rant and moan and bitch right at Christmas time? Me, that's who.

On to today's rant! My local radio station that plays nothing but Christmas music through the season started early. Really early. They actually started playing Christmas music the week BEFORE Thanksgiving. That's pushing it as far as I am concerned. Before you all start throwing things at me and calling me Ebenezer please know that I love me some Christmas music. I play Christmas cds in my car all year long (until my kids start complaining and trying to pitch the cd out the window). Suffice it to say that I have heard every. single. Christmas. song., hymn., carol, ditty, what have you that has ever been recorded. Many of them hundreds of times over the course of this holiday season. So far.

There are a few Christmas songs that irritate the beejeebers right out of me and I thought I would rant and bitch about my Top Five Annoying Christmas Songs that need to be NEVER played again. However, I could only come up with a Top Three. This is how BAD, and HORRIBLE these three songs are. They are soooooo horrific that they stand alone.

Drum roll, please . . . . . . . . . . .

Starting the list in the Number 3 position of Most Annoying Christmas Songs that Never Need to be Played again:

3. I want a hippopotamus for Christmas. (sorry if I screwed up the title, but it is soooo bad I have tried to block it from my mind)

2. I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus - Now seriously? This is what passes for "cute"? Who the hell thought this was a good idea? Makes me want to slap the dog water right out of whoever is singing this tripe.

But the Number One spot for M.A.C.S.T.N.N.T.B.P.A. is reserved for the Big Mac Daddy of all crappy trashy Christmas songs: (ready??)

1. Santa Baby. OMG, this makes me want to poke sharp, hot things in my ears so that I never have to hear this again. The fact that I won't be able to hear ANYTHING at all after that doesn't even cause me to pause. This is the worst sort of crap ever written, recorded or listened to.

It was not too many years ago that we had REAL Christmas songs, White Christmas, Silver Bells, even Frosty the Snowman and Burl Ives (God love him) singing Holly Jolly Christmas. But now we have absolute crap. I think we deserve better.

Anyone else have other Christmas songs that they just can't abide listening to one more time? Feel free to share it here. I guarantee it will make you feel better !!!