Anyhoo, as we were all commenting along, one commenter posted that she had the tackiest ornament known to man in her own collection. It was a gift and she was willing to part with this sad little piece of tackiness and send it to June who could then wrap it up and give it to Dottie. Did you follow all that?
What, you might ask, could be the tackiest ornament known to man? To that question I would have to answer: This
In case it isn't obvious right off the bat, this is an angel made from a tampon.
That's right, tampon. Shall I say it again? T A M P O N.
I thought there was no way this was real, and so I googled Chrimas ornament angel tampon and lo and behold, a plethora of sites popped up all dedicated to making angels out of tampons. Most prefer the Playtex brand.
But then I came across this site. Go there now. I will wait. Just peruse that page for a minute or two.
And when you get your jaw off your desk and your teeth back in your mouth, come on back here.
Are you in shock? Did you have any idea you could do this? Would any of you seriously ever in a gazillion years make any of this crap? Can you imagine, first making this stuff, and then second, GIVING it to someone?
Of course, then I had to figure out which was the tackiest thing on that page. And my first choice was the snowflake/star thing made of tampon holders. That is just so tacky it made me want to gag. But then, I decided that no, the absolute worst and most tacky and white trash of all of them was the Father's Day Toupee. Because really. What man would actually put a toupee made of tampons on his head?
The answer to that would be some Goober who would marry a woman who would MAKE him a tampon toupee! Hee!!!
Horrible + Hilarious = Hilarrible!
OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
ReplyDeleteI know you're planning to do homemade gifts this year, but if you're using that site as your basis, you can leave Chris and me off your list ;) Now THAT is a way to have a cheap Christmas.... threaten your family with giving them those things!!!!
I have this really odd angel that my first account's CFO's wife (how's that for a relationship) made for everyone. They're made out of safety pins. I honestly can't believe he brought them and passed them out....
My parents will be married for 63 years next Valentine's Day. Mom has pierced ears.
ReplyDeleteOh, those earring even gross me out.
*earrings...see I'm so grossed out I can't think straight.
ReplyDeleteSeriously. Who thinks of these things?????? Seriously. Lisa, remember the girls who used to stand at the corner by La Dehesa mall giving out samples of cigarettes, beer, whatever? They were always dressed according to what they were giving out. One day I'm going home, heading down from Nido to turn right there at the mall. I see these skinny girls dressed in white from head to foot. They had a red spot right in the middle of their bellies, and they are passing out samples of . . . . . . Kotex. I almost fell out of the car. The only thing I was happy about is that they didn't place the red dot a little lower on the white suit! This, however, tops that. Except that you don't HAVE to look at that site like you DID have to look at the Kotex girls. Ay yay yay.
ReplyDelete