Hilarity in the Obits

There were not a lot of interesting tidbits that beared repeating, but the ones that were there?  Gems!

Let's start out with a ridiculous use of " ", apostrophes.

"Our loving Husband, Dad, Grand"Pa", Brother and Uncle"

**Really?  apostrophes in the midst of Grandpa?  Capitalization of all titles? Dad, maybe.  Uncle as part of a name.  Say, Uncle Bill.  But just for the sake of clarifying his position in the family?  Nope.  Husband or Brother ?  Never.
That one irritated me.  They should really have had a proofreader.


I love this little bit of info on Brig. General Puck:
"Armin met Marguerite, his wife of 71 years, on a Coco-Cola date".

And let me tell you, opening sentences don't get any better than this:

"On March 30, and at the age of 100, Linda left this world to join the man who had loved her every moment of their 67 years of marriage, and joined him at the gates of heaven. Linda was a brilliant, creative, ambitious woman born before her time."

We come to a pretty scary visual with this one:

"Charles, of San Antonio, miraculously surrounded by family, grand-daughter bouncing on his lap, suddenly passed away on Thursday."

**o. m. g.  I just don't have words for this.


Now this guy gets honors for the best euphemism for dying or passing away.

"Edward, (Brother Ed), age 71, was promoted into glory on Sunday."

Then it gets odd:

"He is survived by his devoted wife of 45 years and helpmate, Katherine of the home; a son of New Braunfels, a daughter of San Antonio"

**His wife "and helpmate" is of the home, while everyone else gets a place of residence?  Seems odd to me.


The most beautifully written, touching obit was for Gloria Goldstein.  This was written by her son and honestly the whole thing was gorgeous.  It made me cry to read it.  Here is just the opening:

"It is with great sadness that I share the passing of my mother, Gloria Goldstein on March 24. I was honored to be her son, and am who I am because of her guidance, generosity and unconditional love."

And last but certainly not least; we have what I know in my heart they did not mean to be funny but it came across that way.  Well, just read this for your own self and see what you think:

"Jan had a big heart and friends too numerous to mention all over the Nation. His sense of humor was legendary. His generosity was notorious. His corneas were donated."

**I will leave that as the last word.  Heee!!