Was it about the Republicans and the whole passel (passle, pasell? how do you spell passel?) of wieners they are trotting out as possible Presidential candidates?
Nope.
Was it about Big Tobacco and lobbyists?
Nope again.
It wasn't even the one about the Real Housewives of whatever and the husband of one of them committing suicide. (I read that one yesterday)
No, the must-see article was about Gerard Depardieu.
Remember him? This is a photo of him before he got older, fatter, and not just fatter but rather bloated looking. Nowadays he looks more like this.
Anyhoo, the article was not about how much larger Mr. Depardieu can continue to get, but this:
Seems that he was on an Air France flight that was delayed. And we all know how much fun THAT can be. So they have hundreds of you crammed in to a small space and making you sit there and wait. And while you wait they ply you with drinks to keep your mind off the fact that you are sitting in a sausage-shaped tin can waiting. Waiting and breathing recycled air.
After a good amount of waiting and an even larger amount of libations have been served the flight finally takes off and the good Mr. Depardieu needed to go relieve himself. Which is exactly the position I would find myself in. And being a 62 year old man who hasn't had to ask permission to go pee for the past, oh say, 61 years, he attempted to get up and go to the toilet.
The air hostess/bar maid/stewardess person told him the plane was still climbing to cruising altitude and he would have to sit back down. He tried to explain his predicament and was told essentially "tough shit. go sit down for 15 more minutes".
And being the grown-ass allegedly drunk Frenchman he is, he took that news in the manner you might think.
He unzipped, whipped it out and proceeded to piss on the carpet of the main cabin of the plane.
Really? Can you imagine yourself in such a position? What would you do? I mean, really, if you have to go, what are your choices? My guess is that he and his 62 year old prostate could not physically wait another 15 minutes.
The article does not say whether the authorities were called upon landing, or if he was charged with anything. If it had been a US airline, you can guaran-damn-tee there would have been hell to pay. Stupid Southwest has kicked people off for wearing short skirts. Imagine what they would have done if someone had shown their schlong!
While I don't agree with pissing in public and then the rest of the people having to smell it the whole damn flight, there has to be a better solution. If the airlines are going to shove liquid refreshments at us to keep us still and happy they have to know it is going to have to come out and be prepared for the consequences. It takes forever for them to get the carts up and down the aisle to serve the whole plane something and by the time they get to the end of the plane, those in the front are already getting antsy and wanting to get up to relieve themselves.
It's a sticky situation.
Bahahahahahahahaha!!!!
Sorry, I just had to say that!
I saw that they ended up being delayed for 2 hours to clean the plane after his "outburst"
ReplyDeleteI have to remember--"I am not fat, just bloated."
ReplyDeleteI am certain he didn't get charged with anything. Remember, he's a celebrity, one of the special people, even if he is looking pretty bad these days, he's still a special person.
ReplyDeleteThere definitely has to be a change. I was on a flight recently where after a delay in takeoff, the flight attendant made a mother with a little girl who was doing the potty dance, sit down for this very same reason. I'm sure that poor little girl wet herself.
I don't know what the answer is, but the current one sure isn't working.